Overdoing it?

[Doberman]

Am I in the minority in that I much prefer to see people not go overboard with their outfits and (probably even more so) their accessories?

If you enjoy your look, more power to you.  Don't let my comments dissuade you in any way.  After all, your own enjoyment is why you're doing it. 

But, let them perhaps cause you to reflect a moment and ponder:

• Do you really want your chest or hat to look like a 5-star general's dress uniform with row after row of favors & pins & doodads?
  
• Is everything (and the kitchen sink) hanging offa your belt actually adding to the effect of your outfit, or is much of it there because the combination of "That looks sorta neat" and "I've still got 2 inches of bare leather on my belt" is too powerful for you to resist?
       
  
  
• It's a scientifically proven fact that there's a point where strapping as many weapons as possible onto your body stops being cool.  That point is age 14.
  
  
  
• Are you comfortable with having more ornaments hanging from your walking staff than most people have on their Christmas trees?
  
  
  
• Should you perhaps either buy stock in the Acme Jangly Bell Company, or just consider paring back the one-woman bells-only symphony caused by your every movement?
  

Now I'm sorry if anyone reading this resembles these remarks a little too closely, but I've watched more than one costume morph over the years from something striking & effective into a (sorry, there's no other way to put it) gaudy mess as the wearer kept adding bits & pieces.  I know that as a purveyor of many things that people like to adorn their garb with, I may be biting the hand that feeds (well, not me since I'm not allowed to eat, but the bosses at least) but I'd love to see some restraint.  There's a point where you go from looking classy & well put together with accessories that complement your outfit, to the Vegas Strip.  We should all, from time to time, take a look at ourselves in the mirror and ascertain which side of the line we're on.

Am I alone here?  Anyone else like to see some subtlety and restraint in garbing?  Any pitfalls to watch out for that I missed?


 

[gem]

Hi, Doug, welcome to the forums!

I dunno, *I* like to see people show a little restraint when joining a new and established community before they start insulting the other members. But maybe I'm in the minority there.

[Doberman]

Hi, Doug, welcome to the forums!

I dunno, *I* like to see people show a little restraint when joining a new and established community before they start insulting the other members. But maybe I'm in the minority there.

First off, your welcome might have been more appropriate 2 years ago when I joined.  (Just a scant few months after you, in fact.)  But, thank you anyways.  (You might want to note that a lack of posting doesn't actually make my comments any less valid than anyone else's on a public forum.)

And secondly, did I insult anyone here?  Did I not say that if you're cool with what you wear, good for you?  Did I not simply propose that everyone should now and again take a step back, look at themselves, and ascertain that they remain completely enamored with what they wear?  Sometimes the addiction of always getting & adding new stuff can overtake someone.  It's good to reassess now and then.  Did I not say that I don't care for it, and wondered if anyone else felt the same?  If you feel that my not liking what you like is an insult to you ("you" being a generality here, of course, not meaning you Gem personally), well ... maybe you're ascribing a little more importance to my opinion than you should.

I would expect that most fairegoers (and costumers) would be able to take my comments with a chuckle, a grain of salt, and possibly a nod of understanding. 

If one disagrees, one could actually answer the questions I posed, telling me, "No, I don't agree.  I like all the gee-gaws.  They provide visual interest to a costume and are a sentimental reminder of times past."  Or one could, you know, take offense and post a passive-aggressive comment.  Personally, I'd choose the former because I find that discussion (most particularly when I vehemently don't agree) is often rewarding and enlightening.  But, ya know, different strokes ...

[Becky10]

 If its making someone happy and they love their look then why should anyone else care, really? I am sure there are probably a million different things that people point to on your garb and say they don't like, but do you want them doing that? Yeah sure you like it and what they're saying probably isn't going to make you stop liking it but no one likes hearing that and it really serves no purpose other than being cruel. People put alot of time, effort, and money into their outfits and that really needs to be kept in mind

I understand that you were aiming for a chuckle or just to point out some faire oddities but i have to say I agree with gem and say you missed the mark and it really did come over as rude and mocking. Would you honestly say this to someones face if you saw them wearing one or more of the stuff you listed? Would you deliver it in the same way? I know i could never do that. I think anyone is going to feel insulted when it appears that someone is telling them that something they are proud of is wrong. Did you insult anyone? Yeah i gotta say i felt pretty insulted and i barely met some of your points. Is this because I hold your opinion so highly ? God no, but its very rarely that you run across such bluntness and that it is jarring.

You kinda jumped on gem and instructed her on how a discussion of this should go and yet how you started this off reads more of a start to a bashing than a discussion ( i can honestly say she took the same tone as your first post). This is obviously something you have seen at faire multiple times so you have to know that there are going to be people on here who fit this description.

   This is a pretty close knit community on here and alot of it is based on building each other up, being supportive and above all being friendly and that is where the number of posts you place does play in. If people are unfamiliar with you they are going to take offense to this because they have little else to base your character off of. This is just the same in life as it is on this forum

Now as for "discussion": I have doodads hanging off my belt, not a ton but I do, I have bells and I love them. If others don't like them then i really couldn't care but i also don't care to have them express that to me. Hell if you want to wear every piece of faire stuff you own at once then whatever. If you are having fun and enjoying yourself than ultimately you're enhancing the faire's entire vibe and if wearing everything you got it what it takes than do it! I think accessories come down to just a personal taste like everything else, you and 50 other people may like deep greens and someone else and their 50 other people may like neon green.

*Edit* I apologize in advance if this reads as bitter or rambling and nonsensical but its now 4 in the morning and I am a bit tired.

[Tixi]

Doberman,

IMHO you should really think about how what you're saying might offend people before you post a bigoted diatribe of people you don't even know to this forum.

The way you expressed the ideas in your post are the antithesis of what faire is supposed to be about. You seem to be missing the idea of community here... I don't know in what community that kind of attitude is tolerated, though.

Faire is about self-expression and freedom and fun and yes I agree with the other responses, not you - I think your remarks were unfair(e)ly insulting and judgmental.

I generally try to be objective and non-confrontational, but I can't help being annoyed by your remarks: rest assured, blanket criticism and abusive denunciations are not going to be well-received here.


<edit/addition>

Criticism is an ego defense mechanism.

In my experience, some people criticize because they lack something in their own life, or because they see something in themselves they don't like. Others may criticize because think they're better than everyone else in some way.

Regardless, discussion of whether people should wear whatever the hell they want should be moot. We don't live in an age or environment with any kind of sumptuary laws, and people can do or wear or say anything they want and you don't have to like any of it.

[Lady Renee Buchanan]

I have a long fabric favor holder & wear it with everything, from peasant to noble.  It probably looks gaudy, as it has pins, favors, etc. on it.  Why do I wear it all the time? 

Because my friends have given these things to me.  They cared enough about me to share a part of them with me.  I could be sitting at faire listening to music, then I look down & see a pin, & start thinking, "---- gave this to me.  I wonder what he/she's doing right now."  And this happens frequently, so I think about the wonderful friends I've made & it makes me so happy.

Recently my husband bought me a new outfit, which I wore to Bristol on the first Sunday.  We just downloaded the pictures from the weekend.  Here is my beautifully coordinated outfit, from feather headpiece, to chemise, bloomers, bodice, & bloomers that match perfectly.  And I have this huge piece of cloth hanging from my belt with stuff all over it.  My first reaction was that it took away from the outfit.  My second thought was my FRIENDS gave me those things, so it looked perfect.

So before anyone thinks about stuff diminishing garb, maybe the first thought should be "Gosh, those things that person is wearing must have special meaning to him/her."

Or you can be like me - and it doesn't matter what other people wear, as long as they're enjoying themselves.  I don't even notice - I'm having too much fun myself.

[Laird Fraser of Lovatt]

I believe in wear what makes you happy and to hell with what anyone else thinks.  I'm waiting on the day someone gives me lip on what i'm garbed in or how i'm wearing it.  

[RenStarr]

For me, I'm more of a minimalist also.  Of course I'm pretty much a minimalist in regards to most areas of my life and I guess that folds over into what I wear to faire and how much I wear to faire.
 
Example:  I'm not one for a bunch of bumper stickers all over my truck or any of the vehicles that I've owned in my life.  I just don't like the look of a vehicle covered with bumper stickers.  But that's just my opinion about my vehicle and in NO way should that effect someone who does want to "express" themselves in that manner. 
So for me, less is more.  But I certainly enjoy seeing and chatting with those that "roll out the ritz" when they come to faire.  Items like that are always a good ice breaker when starting up a conversation with someone that I've never met before.

So Dober....................I can't say I totally disagree with some of the things you said, but the way in which you worded the thoughts that you wanted to express certainly had some rough edges to them and clearly didn't find favor with some of the fine folks in this forum.  Sometimes we just have to agree that we're going to disagree, but one shouldn't be so blunt that it comes off as intentionally insulting and judgemental. 

[Lady Isabella]

If its making someone happy and they love their look then why should anyone else care, really? I am sure there are probably a million different things that people point to on your garb and say they don't like, but do you want them doing that? Yeah sure you like it and what they're saying probably isn't going to make you stop liking it but no one likes hearing that and it really serves no purpose other than being cruel. People put alot of time, effort, and money into their outfits and that really needs to be kept in mind

I understand that you were aiming for a chuckle or just to point out some faire oddities but i have to say I agree with gem and say you missed the mark and it really did come over as rude and mocking. Would you honestly say this to someones face if you saw them wearing one or more of the stuff you listed? Would you deliver it in the same way? I know i could never do that. I think anyone is going to feel insulted when it appears that someone is telling them that something they are proud of is wrong. Did you insult anyone? Yeah i gotta say i felt pretty insulted and i barely met some of your points. Is this because I hold your opinion so highly ? God no, but its very rarely that you run across such bluntness and that it is jarring.

You kinda jumped on gem and instructed her on how a discussion of this should go and yet how you started this off reads more of a start to a bashing than a discussion ( i can honestly say she took the same tone as your first post). This is obviously something you have seen at faire multiple times so you have to know that there are going to be people on here who fit this description.

   This is a pretty close knit community on here and alot of it is based on building each other up, being supportive and above all being friendly and that is where the number of posts you place does play in. If people are unfamiliar with you they are going to take offense to this because they have little else to base your character off of. This is just the same in life as it is on this forum

Now as for "discussion": I have doodads hanging off my belt, not a ton but I do, I have bells and I love them. If others don't like them then i really couldn't care but i also don't care to have them express that to me. Hell if you want to wear every piece of faire stuff you own at once then whatever. If you are having fun and enjoying yourself than ultimately you're enhancing the faire's entire vibe and if wearing everything you got it what it takes than do it! I think accessories come down to just a personal taste like everything else, you and 50 other people may like deep greens and someone else and their 50 other people may like neon green.

*Edit* I apologize in advance if this reads as bitter or rambling and nonsensical but its now 4 in the morning and I am a bit tired.

WELL SAID!!

[Queen Bonnie]

 Everyone has their own look and opinions on what a garb is about. Tolerance, kindness and consideration for others feelings never go out of style!
Anyone who disagrees with this will now get turned into a toad- from one of the wands hanging off my overly loaded belt! LOL!
POOF!!!***<<<<

[isabelladangelo]

My own personal perspective on all clothing: It may make you happy but if it doesn't make everyone around you happy -or you have people trying to avert their eyes, there is something WRONG!   As one friend once said to me upon seeing someone wear very inappropriate coverage -Spandex is a privilege, not a right.  Don't abuse it.  

Now, on to faire garb:   Have I seen some things that are down right tacky?  Yes!   But have I seen things on the Metro in the way to work that are totally wrong?  Yes!  (The dress was a lovely yellow linen shirtwaist dress done in the psuedo 50's style.  The problem?  It was hanky weight linen and I could see her polka dot blue and pink undies in the metro station.  For those that don't live in the DC/VA/MD region - the metro stations are mostly underground.  Aka, it was dark!   So if I could still see through it there....and this was the train ride home...well, you get the idea)

You are going to see things that should not be worn -ever- no matter where you are.   It's one of the reasons I like always having a camera...

As for the specifics: it's not the overdone stuff that bugs me so much.   I do believe that some people need to check out a mirror before leaving and think "Now, if I saw this on someone else, what would I think?" rather than the "I'm so awesome!  Look at my awesomeness!  If anyone dares to snark me, I'll punch them!" because, honestly, the latter is never an attitude to have.   Some humility is a good thing.  

I would ask that everyone remember the RENAISSANCE in the festival and that it's not the beach.  (Yes, I've seen swimsuits at the Renn Fest before and uh...yeah.) Since most renn faires are family friendly, some people need to be reminded about that as well (both in clothing and in attitude.)


The funny thing last year at faire was I saw more people in muggle clothing that were dressed inappropriately than people in garb.   My group of friends and acquaintances all saw the same thing.  One of my friends tried to figure out if one muggle really wasn't wearing any pants beneath her shirt (she had on a black t-shirt and a flannel shirt over that.   ....we couldn't see shorts/jeans/or a skirt.  It became a quest!).  

So while there are certain things that will always bug the heck out of me at faire, I can just as easily find things that bug me outside of faire.  ....does that make me an equal opportunist?

[Dragonlord]

• It's a scientifically proven fact that there's a point where strapping as many weapons as possible onto your body stops being cool.  That point is age 14.
  
  

Yes, but the "scientists" that did this study weren't cool enough to strap on one weapon, let alone multiple ones, therefore making their conclusion null and void.

[DonaCatalina]

Hi,
Despite wearing Spanish garb, I'm a bit of a minimalist myself. (no, honestly). But I don't think this is the forum to go off on how someone's else garb bothers you. It's not as if someone is forcing you to dress like that.
But I hope you enjoy the rest of this forum as I hope everyone does.

[Lady Isabella]

• It's a scientifically proven fact that there's a point where strapping as many weapons as possible onto your body stops being cool.  That point is age 14.
  
  

Yes, but the "scientists" that did this study weren't cool enough to strap on one weapon, let alone multiple ones, therefore making their conclusion null and void.

LMAO

[Lady Kathleen of Olmsted]

To each his/her own.

We all have our styles, Doberman. Accept people's individuality or stay home.

Sorry! I had to vent a little. I am done now.