Let The Countdown Begin!

[Laird Fraser of Lovatt]

ugh... hello people... I just thought I'd drop in with news of my own... don't know a better thread to put it in. On Friday I broke up with my boyfriend, my first love and consequently broke my own heart. I had been lying to myself for a long time by saying I was in love with him. I love him, I care for him, I am comfortable with him.... but not IN love. So I finally broke down and did it. I feel beyond horrible. He feels bad, I blindsided him. I feel bad cause he feels bad, and because I had a constant companion for 2 and a half years and have suddenly made the choice to get rid of it. It's hard... possibly the hardest thing I have ever had to do, but I desire passion and fire... not comfortability. It's strange... I had to be the strongest I have ever been to go through with it and now I feel the weakest I have ever been. I am doubting it and feeling that I made a mistake... I know thats my broken and lonliness talking though. How long does it take to feel better? I am making progress for just 2 days... I cried all day yesterday... today I barely cried at all. I thought I would share it with you guys... people like you make me happy, give me a happy and safe place to land.

I'm so sorry, Fae!   There's really nothing anyone can say to ease the pain but you're a strong woman.  It didn't kill you, so it will only make you stronger.


You're friends & Fairemily are here for you.

[Sir Martin]

I'm sorry you are hurting, Fae, but I know you will get through this.  You are smart, strong and talented, and the only thing I can suggest is to keep yourself occupied with the things you love to do.  We're glad you are here with us.

[Breandan]

*HUGS!*

Trust me Fae, went through something similar after an eight year marriage that had gone south about halfway through, but I refused to see it till it got VERY bad. Each person's different, but my advice to you is simple: focus on you for a bit, don't jump into any new relationships for a while, and do NOT turn to booze, it's bad for you and will tell you lies.  *HUGS!*  You'll pull through this, you're already getting there quickly

[Mouse]

Breandan speaks wisely Fae. I went through something akin to Breandan's situation but there was my daughter involved. Sometimes you refuse to see or you allow yourself to fall into a niche, but most people don't have the strength of their convictions to pull themselves up and reclaim what they cast aside. I know in my case I did what I did to save that fire you spoke of, so I could give my daughter something more than an ember. Step by step and faire by faire. We are here for you.

[LadyShadow]

Huge hugs from me Fae.  It'll get better.

[FaeHollow]

You guys are the best! Seriously... You all brought a smile to my face after a hard hard day!

[Bonny Pearl]

Fae my heart goes out to you!  It's tough ending a relationship, even if it is for the best.  These gentlemen have given you some sound advice.  Be sure to repeat it to yourself when you feel down. 

[FaeHollow]

I am feeling so much better with the advice. I have been talking to people who hadn't gone through similar situations, some had married their first love and it seemed like they KNEW my pain, but didn't have the same grasp of my specific pain in relation to the situation I was dealing with. Hearing that this is similar to an 8 year marriage makes me feel not so alone, and I am sure the pain isn't as strong because of the time... i wasn't even near 8 years.. whew! I am so lucky to have found this place, found faires and it is keeping me strong knowing that I am being true to myself, and faire is the only place I can feel 100% me, he had a severe problem with faire so it hurt me to know he wasn't accepting of me at my most... well.. ME! Thank you guys so much for the support, you really have no clue how much it means to me!

[Laird Fraser of Lovatt]

On a lighter note, Fae... i love the new avatar...   

[Mouse]

Aye, I second that remark on the avatar

[Rapier Half-Wit]

Fae, I'm not going to tell you that you did the right thing. You know you did or you wouldn't have done it. What I will tell you is that years down the road you will look back on this from a completly different vantage point. You will see and understand things later in life much better than you do now. And you will be better and stronger for it.

[Breandan]

and if you ever need anyone to vet any future dates, you can lock em in a room with us for an hour and we can help determine if they are worth dating

[Laird Fraser of Lovatt]

I'll bring my Tazer!  *ZAP*

[Rapier Half-Wit]

[there goes another squirrel]

[Mouse]

Three threads, three posts abut squirrels and Fraser....Enlighten me, por favour?