Unenthusiastic friends?

[tigrlily64]

This past Sunday, I joined my friends for a fun day at Bristol.  I definitely had tons of fun, don't get me wrong, but they definitely weren't as enthusiastic as I am.  For example, I spent months sewing my own bodice, (as the ladies and gentlemen on the sewing board can attest to-I had LOTS of questions! ;-) ) but my friend simply pulled out an old, polyester, stained, medieval-ish gown and wore that.  Another thing is that I love to see EVERYTHING at faire that I possibly can-but my friends walked right past some itneresting shops, acts, and people, just to get to certain shows on time.  It was all very regimented.  Get there, eat, see three shows, the joust, and then leave.  When I did drag them into shops, they glanced around, then stood there waiting for me.  Am I just way too into faire?  Or have you guys had this kind of problem?  I don't mean to complain, I was just a little disappointed.

[Taffy Saltwater]

This sounds like my son.  Once he has a beer or three and swiveled his head around like an owl on ball bearings, he's ready to go.  My mom would complain about the walk and I've yet to be able to persuade my sister to go.

So I go by myself, get there as early as I want to, sit and people watch to my heart's content, and leave when I'm ready.  I'd rather go by myself & have a good time than put up with a buzzkill all day.

[Athena]

It's happened to me! In fact, the two friends I went with for the very first time never returned, and really have no desire to.

Over the years I've taken several friends and family members. Reactions have ranged from bored to mildly amused to enthusiastic. In the beginning I was disappointed that some of them (especially the ones I thought would find faire interesting) just couldn't get into it, but now I figure it's just not going to be everyones cup of tea.

If your friends aren't into it, then don't force the issue. Let them know they are always welcome to go with you, but if the interest isn't there invite another friend to go, or go by yourself. I know that may be daunting, but I started doing that when I realized that I was the only one seriously bitten by the faire bug and even the most enthusiastic friends and family weren't interested in attending more than one weekend. It was a little scary at first, especially since I'm shy (though some people who know me at faire would have trouble believing it LOL), but I just did it. It really helped connecting with people on the forums, so I wasn't completely alone.

Try networking on the forums. Is Bristol home? I know some fabulous people who go there and they would make you feel very welcome. If you don't have an R/F pin, order one so you can be spotted at faire. I hope you find a friend to share your passion, but if not try meeting people through R/F and you'll have a great time. Good luck!

[renfairephotog]

Go with some RF'ers.  Fins out when and where the meet and greet is.  Lady Renee can proably tell you the time.

[Ginette]

I am so sorry you had friends that aren't as into faire as you.  I've had friends say they are having fun but walk around like I'm making them go to faire.  Can anyone be too into faire?  But if a group meets at your home faire, you'll find it on these forums.  Defiantly get an R/F pin from DB, the pin is almost like a magnet to other R/F members.  Best of luck!   

[sealion]

This sounds like my son.  Once he has a beer or three and swiveled his head around like an owl on ball bearings, he's ready to go.  My mom would complain about the walk and I've yet to be able to persuade my sister to go.

So I go by myself, get there as early as I want to, sit and people watch to my heart's content, and leave when I'm ready.  I'd rather go by myself & have a good time than put up with a buzzkill all day.

Amen sistah!
My kids don't enjoy the same things at faire that I do so we go our seperate ways and just meet up for lunch. That way they can do the things that they enjoy and I can do the things that I enjoy. The only friends we hang out with at faire are the ones we met there.

[Khaalis]

Yer definitely not alone. I have a number of friends that I "choose" not to go to faire with (and others that I go with regularly). Those I choose not to go with are either friends I know won't really enjoy it, or are friends who get a mild kick out of it for a day visit once every few seasons and won't dress in garb. To me its just not worth it. I love my friends dearly, but I don't want to ruin my own enjoyment at faire to go with people who don't appreciate it as much as we do. Even for those who come occasionally, I'm happy to say hello, maybe have lunch together, but then we go our separate ways and do our own thing. Works out best that way IMHO.

[DonaCatalina]

We all have friends and family who are not as enthusiastic about faire as we are. I can drag my friend out once a year, she does a little shopping and she's ready to go.
She says all the acts are boring so she doesn't really want to see any shows.
But she likes making garb, so that's her only reason for going in the first place.
It's a conundrum alright.

[Dev]

My boyfriend's enthusiastic, but in a tourist-y way.  I go as a playtron and he wears a loudly patterned polo (bright purple, orange with green stripes, etc.), khaki shorts, and running shoes...as if a 6' 260 lb guy with crazy black hair, an epic goatee of epicness, and a Jack Nicholson smile isn't already hard to ignore.  I like to interact with people and be flexibly in-character, he walks around with a map and a beer talking about what shows he wants to see next and sticking those gold award stickers from games all over himself.  I sort of understand him, though; because he sticks out like a sore thumb, actors tend to target him a bit more and he gets chosen to be a crowd volunteer which is fun.

He cramps my style when I try to act in-character.  It's not even the plain clothes, because I went with one of my friends who wore an Immortal band-shirt, denim shorts, and running shoes but he interacted with the cast instead of standing there with his arms crossed.  It's like when you're a little kid playing and even though you're not what you're imagining, you get so into it that your imagination fills in the blanks and reality takes a back seat.

[bellevivre]

It's also possible for people to be enthusiastic in different ways- I want to be walking around, shopping and seeing things, and Hubby likes do his routine at TRF (prince of wales, wander, Sea Devil, wander, repeat) and socialize... I enjoy socializing, but that can be done at camp!!!

I have wanted/needed faire before I EVER went- my parents were going to TRF in the 80's and would bring back pictures of this marvelous place- lol i knew the first time I stepped foot on grounds that TRF was HOME!

I do have other friends who think it's 'fun', but these are more the type of people who would go to a SciFi convention to gawk at the costumes, etc, than really feeling the SPIRIT of the thing...

[Laird Fraser of Lovatt]

I've given up on my wife... she likes to go to TRF and enjoys herself but she really doesn't get into it.  Twice a year and she's good to go until next year.  I'm trying to corrupt/ turn my best friend into a rennie... loves Faire and the party aspect of it.  All it should take is a little push to get him to cross over the line... maybe camping at TRF will help with that "push"  

[Lady Rebecca]

Most of my friends at school that I've gone with to faires have really enjoyed themselves, but I've had a few who are only too ready to leave early, which is a major pain. I've only gone to one faire by myself (St. Louis), but I'm probably going to be heading back up to Sterling by myself in a couple weeks. (The first time I went, I was with 3 friends, 2nd time with 1 friend, and it looks like no one can come the next time I can).

But I'm expecting to still enjoy myself. It will let me be completely on my own schedule. Because of course, everyone always wants to see different shows at the same time. I've found myself splitting up with the people I've come with multiple times before.

[Carl Heinz]

If yer hooked, yer hooked.  If you're not you're not.

Some folks learn to love it.  Some folks who loved it, get tired of it.

We've gone all these years because many of our friends are also participants, so I tend to tour the site during workshops to see who's there and who's not.  Talk to the crafts director to verify whether someone's not coming back, and to learn about some of the new folks, etc.  Of course, we've already had the guild kickoff prior to workshops so we've a pretty good handle on who'll be with us there.  As an aside, if you're in California, and interested in joining the Guild of St Cuthbert, drop me an email.  We're always recruiting.

If you're part of the community, then it's probably easier to stay enthusiastic.

[BLAKDUKE]

Well I would like to relate a story of a different nature.  As many of you know, my wife and I were King and Queen in TNRF for 9 years.  When we "retired" in 1997, we decided to take it easy for a while.  Early in the 21st century I caught wind of 2 new small 1 weekend faires in Florida call Gulf Coast Faires.  I called the owner and after one test run we struck a deal.  Now in TNRF I had made a big knighting sword, but I had a squire to carry it for me.  In Gulf Coast I had no one to act a squire, so I started to look for one.  I found a good friend here where I work at a mundane job(it sure would be nice to be able to, for real, collect the taxes that my King's personna always threatens to invoke).  Now this guy, in his late 30's at the time, is so redneck he would make Jeff Foxworthy look and sound like a damn yankee(me).  I got him into garb that I had plus some stuff that he bought himself.  For the entire weekend he was my squire.  My friends I have created a Frankenstien Renn-monster.  He took to it like a duck to water.   He now has almost as much garb as I do plus weapons galore, and he and his wife are our constant companions at Gulf Coast.   So it can happen.

[Rowan MacD]

So I go by myself, get there as early as I want to, sit and people watch to my heart's content, and leave when I'm ready.  I'd rather go by myself & have a good time than put up with a buzzkill all day.

Amen to that!
You can lead a horse to water.....
    I have tried and failed more times than I can count to get non-rennie friends interested in fair and finally had to face the fact that liking/not liking renaissance just comes natural to folks. They do or they don't.  I attended fair for years alone.  Dragging somebody else along and then worrying that they may not be having a good time is just SO not worth it.
   If you go solo, just walk around and interact with everyone else. No one thinks it odd to see a lone wench, Lady, peasant or Lord out shopping.  You are just part of the ambiance, and since you are not 'working' (read Playtron like moi) you are free to do as you please.  I have no problems with going by myself, and in fact I met my husband that way.
    I love to interact,  but my man takes it to a new level...he will walk around all day, talk to every single person (he loves kids), and does not want to leave until the fair closes, then he stays to help break down.  Gotta love the guy.