Unenthusiastic friends?

[LunasReincarnate]

i forced my ex-fiance one year to go with me every day to the faire... and that made me happy and i thought he liked it till the next year when he said " i dont really want to go this year!" i still got him to go with me 2 times. 

as for my friends, they all enjoy it. but im the only one who usually dresses up (authentically).  and my friends dont like going every day 1 or 2 times is enough for them.  so this yeah i hope to make friends at the faire   instead.

[Malkavian]

This whole line of conversation is actually why I generally go alone.  My MO at a fair is generally to wander around a LOT--since I photograph pretty heavily to me there's always something else to see, and I generally spend full days roaming around, people watching and catching the odd show. 

Most of my friends (and parents) that have been are content with an end-to-end walk of the grounds, a few shows, perhaps a meal.  Having someone standing at your shoulder grousing about having to walk more is a pain and kinda kills the immersion, soooo

[Aniroaldawen]

None of my family are into Faire, but I love being able to go alone.  It means I can park myself by the Jolly Rogers' stage an hour before their show to get the best seats!  Attending alone lets me take advantage of the faire day and make sure I can see everything I want to see.

[gypsylakat]

For me it kind of bites, my boyfriend is allergic to cigg. smoke but I love going with him, but it pretty much means I can't meet anyone from the forum because the meets are generally in the bars/taverns... and it's a constant battle figuring out where to stand to see and still avoid the smoke... I've gone once without him and ended up getting a tag along that I felt responsible for...

[Witchhawk]

I have noticed, and I include myself here, that people go to Faire for different reasons. Some are hard-core and want to be everywhere and see everything. Some go just to be there, because it is different. Some are there to shop, others go just for the shows. I was with a group just yesterday at MD RennFest where some just had to go in to every shop - which bored me to death. But I dealt with it because I still got to do what I wanted to do regardless.

The first time that I went I had a good time and decided to get some garb together for the future. Since then my wife and I go once or twice a year, sometimes in garb and sometimes not. I am a rather shy person and only occasionally interact with mundanes and actors, but I am gaining confidence in that. I like to just watch people and catch some shows as I wander by. My wife likes seeing all of the shops & vendors. Sometimes I will go just to take pictures. I have found that I don't like dressing up in garb and carrying camera gear, so I'll do one or the other.

I guess you can't please everyone all of the time, so the trick is to either meet some folks that attend for the same reasons as you, or try to strike a balance with those that you do end up going with. I don't like standing around twiddling my thumbs while the wife peruses a shop but I make the best of it by observing other people's garb (to get ideas) or chatting with an actor (while trying to get my confidence up). There's also no rule that a group HAS to stick together all day.

WH

[Butch]

Well, I just put the invitation out there, and tell them where I'll be at a certain time (gate at opening, whatever show/event at whatever time, etc.), and let them go if they like.  My wife goes with me, and my two children (15 & 18) invite friends and enjoy the faire with them.

I feel the invitation is enough.  I tell them "Don't worry, I'll have a good time without you.  It would just be better with you."  If they wanna hang out with my wife and me, that's fine, but if there are certain shows we wanna catch, we go there.  We're all adults!

[Captain Cornelius Howard Duckman]

I think one of the most important things is to never be responsible for the transportation of someone who you don't know their fair style of. Had some horrible experiences with people who wanted to leave faire early, whihc is a sin in my book.

[LadyHawkeontheHill]

Lots of walking is part of the fun! My costumes look best when I walk! I go by myself alot because my friends and family think I've gone off the edge by getting as involved as I have yet they always want to see the newest photos. There's ALWAYS someone at faire to hang out with and every faire I visit has lots and lots of ren friends whom I've met thru this forum! Getting mundanes interested is difficult and boyfriends get upset about my going to faire with or without them, so, I go alone and I always have a great time! No arguing or whining about being bored from others. I have a sneaking suspicion that me mum is a closet rennie, she'll be at ORF this year in garb! Go mom!

[Lims]

I worked at MiRF for a few years, so I would always ride with a friend that worked there, too.  I took this year off, so now I just drive myself.  

The one time I rode with someone else, they KNEW well before going that I was going to be there an hour before cannon and I was not leaving until after closing cannon.  They had a blast even though thier feet hurt worse than they remember.  I just smiled and chuckled, remembering the feeling.

[Carl Heinz]

For me (and I suspect for my wife, too), the primary reason we keep going is that a lot of our friends are also participants or crafts people.  And you really can enjoy the interaction.  A good number of my Facebook "friends" are friends from Faire.

[Jinglebum]

I went around faire completely on my own for the first time last year, and I actually enjoyed faire a bit more that way. Most of the people I attend with are just as enthusiastic as (if not more than) I am, but wandering around faire on my own definitely adds something I wouldn't otherwise experience were I walking around with a group of my friends.
Going with someone unenthusiastic really can kill the mood, as I learned opening weekend of TRF last year when I kinda sorta forced my ex to go. He spent the whole time bored and looking kind of annoyed, not enjoying the shows (or wanting to give most of them a chance), and getting weirded out by my interactions with fellow rennies. It really put a damper on the weekend.

[KeeperoftheBar]

I have given up on taking most of my family, friends and even girlfriend to the Faire.  It is much nicer to go alone and enjoy it than to bring someone who grouses and complains about everything.  And this way, I can get there before opening which seems to be beyond some people's ability or desire.  Besides, at TRF, friends abound, some of whom I haven't met.  (yet...)

[will paisley]

The first time that I went I had a good time and decided to get some garb together for the future. Since then my wife and I go once or twice a year, sometimes in garb and sometimes not. I am a rather shy person and only occasionally interact with mundanes and actors, but I am gaining confidence in that. I like to just watch people and catch some shows as I wander by. My wife likes seeing all of the shops & vendors. Sometimes I will go just to take pictures. I have found that I don't like dressing up in garb and carrying camera gear, so I'll do one or the other.

I guess you can't please everyone all of the time, so the trick is to either meet some folks that attend for the same reasons as you, or try to strike a balance with those that you do end up going with. I don't like standing around twiddling my thumbs while the wife peruses a shop but I make the best of it by observing other people's garb (to get ideas) or chatting with an actor (while trying to get my confidence up). There's also no rule that a group HAS to stick together all day.

No idea how badly you want to increase your confidence, but if you're really serious about it, dress up in garb one day, go to someplace like Old Town Alexandria, Colonial Williamsburg or another historic place, and just sit on a bench in public for a few hours.  You won't have to work up your confidence to interact with people, because they'll come and interact with you.  I guarantee that, after an hour or so at the most, you'll have come up with a character name and a backstory, out of sheer necessity.  The public will do most of the work - all you'll have to do is react.

[Dinobabe]

No idea how badly you want to increase your confidence, but if you're really serious about it, dress up in garb one day, go to someplace like Old Town Alexandria, Colonial Williamsburg or another historic place, and just sit on a bench in public for a few hours.  You won't have to work up your confidence to interact with people, because they'll come and interact with you.  I guarantee that, after an hour or so at the most, you'll have come up with a character name and a backstory, out of sheer necessity.  The public will do most of the work - all you'll have to do is react.

Hey, that's a cool idea!
I never thought of it that way but that is exactly what happens when I do Civil War reenacting.  It really does become a necessity!

[Sir. Kindle]

I find it to be hit or miss with many of my friends and family. My oldest brother, who lives close to the Pennsylvania Ren. Faire, went once and would be happy if he never had to go back again. My parents are the same way. My middle brother likes to go, and even dresses up, but only has one outfit and can't understand why I need more than one. He also only goes once, maybe twice a year, at the most. However, I'm lucky in that my wife likes to go to faire and, while she isn't into it quite as much as I am, she enjoys it enough to go with me. Likewise, I have a few friends that love to dress up and go to faire, so I always seem to have someone to go with.

Now, I did have a very similar experiences this past Labor Day weekend. I went to New York to visit a friend who said he was interested in dressing up and going to faire with us. So, I packed a couple of different outfits for him, let him know, to the best of my ability, what to expect at faire, and hoped for the best. Well, Labor Day weekend came and it was a little hot, so he chose the outfit that wouldn't be as hot to wear, but was also rather lacking in "flashiness." While he says he had a good time, I could tell from the moment we entered the faire, that this just wasn't his thing. He didn't look around much at the shops, pointed out all the mistakes the performers made, even if they were really good and very entertaining, and always wanted to take breaks, but then complained when we missed a show. He also noticed how "under dressed" he was, once we entered the faire and kept pointing this out to us every chance he had. While my wife and I still had fun, I could tell that this wasn't something that he'd get into like I have. He did, however, really enjoy all the..ahem..."skin" that women at the faire were showing off.