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The Squire's Tavern => Squire's Tavern => Topic started by: Norfolk on August 10, 2013, 11:23:42 AM

Title: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Norfolk on August 10, 2013, 11:23:42 AM
Share your stories of the funniest things a 'dane has said to you. 

Here is ours from this season in Colorado:  While I was talking with a group of patrons near the Royal Pavillion, the Duchess approached two fellows who were sitting under the trees a short distance away.  As she came near, they said to her "that is a gorgeous gown, tell us about it".  Whereupon the Duchess hauled up her gold-chain girdle, showed them her pomander, and asked "do you know what this is?"  One fellow replied immediately: "No, but if I pull on it, will it flush?"

This little vignette kept the entire Court in giggles for the remainder of the weekend!
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Merlin the Elder on August 11, 2013, 09:16:42 AM
I believe I have related this before, but in the days when we dressed before coming to faire, we were leaving a restaurant in Waxahachie, TX on our way to Scarby. I was in my wizard robes, and a woman ran up to me at the door and told me that her 4-year-old had looked at me and asked her, "Mommy? Is that God?" 
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: PollyPoPo on August 11, 2013, 09:45:14 AM
Quote from: Merlin the Elder on August 11, 2013, 09:16:42 AM
I believe I have related this before, but in the days when we dressed before coming to faire, we were leaving a restaurant in Waxahachie, TX on our way to Scarby. I was in my wizard robes, and a woman ran up to me at the door and told me that her 4-year-old had looked at me and asked her, "Mommy? Is that God?" 

Bwaaaaa haaa haaaa. 

(That took care of my Sunday morning laugh-out-loud exercise.)
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Norfolk on August 11, 2013, 09:51:12 AM
Quote from: Merlin the Elder on August 11, 2013, 09:16:42 AM
I believe I have related this before, but in the days when we dressed before coming to faire, we were leaving a restaurant in Waxahachie, TX on our way to Scarby. I was in my wizard robes, and a woman ran up to me at the door and told me that her 4-year-old had looked at me and asked her, "Mommy? Is that God?"

Good one, Merlin!

Something along those lines happened to a playtron friend of ours a couple years ago.  Dressed in her very elaborate lady pirate outfit, she popped into a local grocer on her way to Larkspur one Sunday morning.  She was standing in the checkout line when she felt a tug on her skirt.  Looking down, she beheld the beaming face of a little girl of 4 or 5 years, who promptly asked "what church to YOU go to?"
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Capt Spleen on August 11, 2013, 10:00:26 AM
...and as I look out upon my Sunday morning garden.......

I can't help thinking

*Th' Scurvy Church o' th' S'Aleing Liquiteers*
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Merlin the Elder on August 11, 2013, 08:00:54 PM
LOL! I love my life!
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Rowan MacD on August 12, 2013, 09:32:02 AM
    About 6 years or so ago, I was on my way to the Nebraska faire, back in the days when it was at Scary Acres and I was on cast. 
    I stopped at a Kwik Shop to get a coffee on the way to opening gate.  I was dressed in my 'utility wench' get up-white full sleeved peasant smock tied at the neck and wrists,  plain front laced twill bodice and a blue cotton skirt.  I had a muslin apron over that.
A little girl standing in line with her mom, kept twisting around to stare at me.  Her eyes were huge.   She finally blurted out:
  "Are you Snow White?"  I just about choked on my coffee.  Her mom and the cashier were  both chuckling.
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: mehan on August 13, 2013, 12:16:48 PM
Not nearly as good as some that have already been told - but this cracked me up.   My Ewan wore a kilt to the local beer festival and a very nice, but obviously tipsy gentleman pointed to his sporran (which is actually a rob roy and if you get that visual you will understand my hilarity) - and said "nice COD SACK".  I pretty much lost it.
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Lady Renee Buchanan on August 13, 2013, 08:21:17 PM
Goodness , it seems like people are the same. Everywhere!  Lord Phillip and Lady Kathleen visited us this weekend, and on Sunday, we went to Bristol.

Steve stopped for gas in a town about a half hour away from our house.  Kathy and I ran in to get coffee, and the guys were outside putting in e gas.  Both men were wearing noble garb.

While they were at the pump, some guys came out from paying for their gas and asked them what church did they go to, wearing those kind of clothes.
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Rowan MacD on August 15, 2013, 10:29:19 AM
  "Why, The Church of England, of course!"  LOL.
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: DonaCatalina on August 16, 2013, 06:08:30 AM
Quote from: mehan on August 13, 2013, 12:16:48 PM
Not nearly as good as some that have already been told - but this cracked me up.   My Ewan wore a kilt to the local beer festival and a very nice, but obviously tipsy gentleman pointed to his sporran (which is actually a rob roy and if you get that visual you will understand my hilarity) - and said "nice COD SACK".  I pretty much lost it.
Like this one?
(http://www.kilts-n-stuff.com/images/product/sporran_msl1012.gif)
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Alaric on August 19, 2013, 09:11:17 AM
One time I stopped to get gas on my way home from PGH - I didnt have on my doublet or hat (just shirt , breeches and bucket boots) - guy in the car beside me looks, looks again, looks a third time and finally asks "what are you some kind of civil war re-enactor"?  :o
His wife chimes in "don't be rude Dear he is Amish"  :o

Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: DonaCatalina on September 11, 2013, 08:13:54 AM
I don't get to hear funny things at Fair anymore.
We've been asked if we're the king and queen so many times that it's not funny.
Of course there is usually someone who at least once tries to tell us that there were no Spanish Nobles allowed in England while Anne Boleyn was queen.
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Gauwyn of Bracknell on September 11, 2013, 10:37:19 AM
Quote from: DonaCatalina on September 11, 2013, 08:13:54 AM
I don't get to hear funny things at Fair anymore.
We've been asked if we're the king and queen so many times that it's not funny.
Of course there is usually someone who at least once tries to tell us that there were no Spanish Nobles allowed in England while Anne Boleyn was queen.

While we were at Scarby this year, M'Lady was approached by a women and a very tired daughter (6ish) and wanted to know if she was the queen, to which my wife started to nod 'no', but caught the lady shaking her head and saying that her daughter would not leave until she met the queen.  Needless to say, she was the queen for a few moments.
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Rowan MacD on September 11, 2013, 12:14:03 PM
   That was good of you!  When it happens to us, I always fell a little embarrassed.

   I wonder why it was so hard to find the Royals?

   They should either be walking around or holding court most of the time.  They should always be easy to find and easier to spot; they are the characters most people come to see.

  Mom and daughter may have been headed to the gate.  Mom wanted to get home while her little one was trying to stall.   Good to see the kids wanting to stick around ;D .
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Gauwyn of Bracknell on September 11, 2013, 07:44:41 PM
Actually the court at Scarby is very visible and engaging, one of the best.   It was somewhat early in the day. 
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: scarletnyx on September 12, 2013, 12:07:46 AM
Husband and I were going to a Halloween party around this time last year. We left late at night, around 10pm or so, in our full garb at the time ( Me in my druid outfit, him in his Tuareg outfit).

Next day at work, one of his coworkers who lives in our apartment complex asks what sort of church we were going to dressed in " that weird stuff ".

He's gotten a few " What are you supposed to be" at faires. I haven't gotten anything -yet-.
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Rowan MacD on September 12, 2013, 10:04:58 AM
Quote from: Gauwyn of Bracknell on September 11, 2013, 07:44:41 PM
Actually the court at Scarby is very visible and engaging, one of the best.   It was somewhat early in the day.
I'm sure they are! ;D     That's why I figured the little girl might be trying to stall Mom because she didn't want to go home yet.
     I've seen it many times- the kids get within sight of the gate and realize they are leaving; that's when they just have to have a trinket, or stop to talk to a street character.   Good to see the little ones having fun and wanting to stay.
Title: Re: 'Danes Say The Funniest Things!
Post by: Merlin the Elder on September 13, 2013, 06:47:08 AM
Quote from: Gauwyn of Bracknell on September 11, 2013, 07:44:41 PM
Actually the court at Scarby is very visible and engaging, one of the best.   It was somewhat early in the day. 
Thanks for saying that, m'Lord. Of the faires I have visited, I must still say that our cast at Scarby is the best overall...and yes, I am indeed biased.  The king and queen are almost always together, but Queen Margaret (obviously) has her own court to keep. But Scarborough is a good-sized village, and one cannot be everywhere at once.

In general, you can't swing a dead rat on a string without hitting one of the Scarby cast members. Their numbers are many!