IDIOT SIGHTING:
We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large'enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not.. Four is larger than two..."
We haven't used Sears repair since.
IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, "You gave me too much money." I said, "Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back." She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said "We're sorry but we cannot do that kind of thing." The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change..
Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."
From Kingman , KS .
IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.
From Kansas City
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask.
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
IDIOT SIGHTING:
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"
She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS
IDIOT SIGHTING:
We were having a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker, as she was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff's office, no less
IDIOT SIGHTING:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "It's open!" His reply, "I know. I already got that side. This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , MS .
IDIOT SIGHTING:
When I left Hawaii and was transferred to Florida , I still had the Hawaiian plates on my car, as my car was shipped from Hawaii . I was parking somewhere (I can't remember) and a guy asked me "Wow, you drove from Hawaii to here?" I looked at him and quickly said "Yep. I took the Hawaii/San Francisco Bridge". He nodded his head and said "Cool!"
STAY ALERT! They walk among us... and they VOTE and they REPRODUCE..........
During an early 90's solar eclipse, I had a Foreman ask me if the backside of the moon got extremely hot as it covered the sun. ::)
Several years ago at Arby's I told the clerk I wanted four regular roast beef sandwiches, my wife wanted two and one more for my young son. The clerk went for a calculator.
Remember people, someone has to make our fries! ;D
Had a co-worker honestly ask when she found out Jews do not eat ham/pork..."Well what do they eat at Easter"?
"You want fries with that?"
Quote from: Sir William Marcus on July 12, 2009, 04:37:08 PM
STAY ALERT! They walk among us... and they VOTE and they REPRODUCE..........
and reproduce, and reproduce... ;D
...It's people like this that make me fear for the survival of our species...
Oh my. Those were good. Hopefully I wont cross too many of that kind.
I work with these people. I work for these people. I need a new job...
I work at Ball Aerospace and fix PC's for Rocket Scientists. Funny many are just like those people above... honestly. And just think these are the ones that just sent up Kepler and fixed Hubble... again
I too need a new job.
My brother used to do phone internet support. He complained about people calling in to ask why they couldn't get online without a computer, or my favorite, the guy who called to say his computer wouldn't turn on. When asked if he checked the plugs, he said it was too dark to see, because his power had gone out.
Back in the day, I worked as a volunteer firefighter.
We were called out to an accident, and specifically told to bring cutters and jaws of life to remove someone from a vehicle.
When we arrived, we found the driver had been killed instantly but that the police and other bystander types could not figure out how to remove him from the badly crushed driver side door.
Our chief, walked up... looked around once and walked around to the passenger door and opened it right up... the body was easily removed
(OK, it's a gruesome story...but true, I was there)
I will give them credit for being in a high stress situation but they had been working on that door a good 15 minutes before we arrived.
It didn't help that the next day the local paper ran a story including the mental slip by the police and the brilliant move of opening the passenger door by the chief.
*Fightfighters can put away serious amounts of rum btw*
Sometimes, a picture is worth a thousand words-
(http://ciarraide.org/temp/pics/ATF_earplug.jpg)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/vytdtz.jpg)
Thankfully, for when these stupid people finally fall victim to their own idiocy, we have The Darwin Awards! ;D
Makes ya wonder sometimes how some people just make you think hhmmmmmm.......wow
I saw a bumper sticker the other day that made me want to find one for my van.... the sticker read in nice bold letters........ Stupid should hurt
Quote from: Lady de Laney on July 12, 2009, 09:39:14 PM
I work at Ball Aerospace and fix PC's for Rocket Scientists. Funny many are just like those people above... honestly. And just think these are the ones that just sent up Kepler and fixed Hubble... again
Well, look at it this way... if they were actually intelligent, the Hubble wouldn't have needed to be fixed to begin with...
Quote from: Breandan on July 13, 2009, 10:27:22 PM
Sometimes, a picture is worth a thousand words-
(http://ciarraide.org/temp/pics/ATF_earplug.jpg)
From a pure view of intelligence...Who is more the idiot, the man with the gun to his head, or the moron standing in front of the line of fire to take the "shot"?
Lord I hope that's a staged photo for both their sakes...Given the anti ATF message I'm guessing it is.
There are 2 establishments in the building where we have our restaurant. The other one is a bar. The bar owner had a problem with his bathroom plumbing. The lease requires the tenant to pay the first $75 and the owner of the building (not us) has to pay the remainder of the bill. This particular bill was for $400.
The plumbing company sent the owner of the bar a bill for $75. He then sent us a bill for $75. He sent the owner of the building a bill for $250.
When my husband called him on it, he said he thought the tenants had to pay $75 each. Why in the world would someone think that we would pay part of a bill for the toilet of the owner of another business?
I work for a distributor that handles commercial hardware and fasteners.
No, its not Home Depot.
But we do occasionally get calls from people who really should have gone to home depot.
One of my favorites:
Caller: I need some bolts to fix my gazebo
Sales: Do you know what type of bolt you need?
Caller: Oh, the regular kind.
Sales: Well, do you know what size you need?
Caller: You know just the regular size bolts for gazebos.
<sigh>
About a decade ago, I was in a Key West tattoo shop explaining to the guy (a guy who's job relies on creativity, artistry and imagination) a design I wanted. I wanted a dragon and a tiger wrapping around each other and going up my spine. He kept showing me pictures of a tiger on the ground and a dragon in the air.
Me: No...I want them wrapped around each other and separating at my shoulders.
Him: Well...you know...tigers don't really bend that way.
Me: *Blink, blink*
Him: *Awkward silence*
Me: Well...you know...dragons don't really exist!
Needless to say, I decided not to spend my money there
QuoteQuote from: Lady de Laney on July 12, 2009, 09:39:14 PM
I work at Ball Aerospace and fix PC's for Rocket Scientists. Funny many are just like those people above... honestly. And just think these are the ones that just sent up Kepler and fixed Hubble... again
Well, look at it this way... if they were actually intelligent, the Hubble wouldn't have needed to be fixed to begin with...
OK people, that is just mean. I'm a rocket scientist and I'm no where near stupid!!!! Some smart people don't have common sense, but I know a million rocket scientists and they are some of the smartest people I know!!!!
So I have another one for ya. My sister was dating this fireman and she was telling him about a missionary trip she did to China years ago. He replied, "So people in different countries don't have the same religion as here?" This made me laugh for the longest time!!!
Quote from: LadyElizabeth on July 14, 2009, 03:51:22 PMSome smart people don't have common sense
FTFY! ;)
Oh and....
COMMON SENSESo rare, it's practically a Super Power
If i could teach a class on common sense, I'd be a multi millionare... just think about all the return customers!
"Common sense" is my favorite oxymoron.
I work for Aggies.
Purely coincidental, of course.
Quote from: LadyElizabeth on July 14, 2009, 03:51:22 PM
...I'm a rocket scientist...I know a million rocket scientists and they are some of the smartest people I know!!!!
I work as a design engineer for an electronics firm...know a few "rocket scientists" myself. I was called out on a field issue...When referring to a problem the customer said "This ain't rocket science, we know rocket science and this ain't it"! She stated it with full ironic intent. Darn near fell out of my chair laughing. She clearly intended it as a joke.
Another favorite of my family stories, involving stupid things. My grandfather was part of the team that worked on the lunar lander. They were told to design a radio antenna that would extend from the bottom of the lander. It needed to be able to withstand impact with, as they were told, 'a standard lunar rock' while still being usable, but not unbalancing the craft if it landed on something. When my grandfather asked what they meant by 'a standard lunar rock' he was only told that that data was part of the goals for the mission, and that nobody knew.
Quote from: LadyElizabeth on July 14, 2009, 03:51:22 PM
QuoteQuote from: Lady de Laney on July 12, 2009, 09:39:14 PM
I work at Ball Aerospace and fix PC's for Rocket Scientists. Funny many are just like those people above... honestly. And just think these are the ones that just sent up Kepler and fixed Hubble... again
Well, look at it this way... if they were actually intelligent, the Hubble wouldn't have needed to be fixed to begin with...
OK people, that is just mean. I'm a rocket scientist and I'm no where near stupid!!!! Some smart people don't have common sense, but I know a million rocket scientists and they are some of the smartest people I know!!!!
So I have another one for ya. My sister was dating this fireman and she was telling him about a missionary trip she did to China years ago. He replied, "So people in different countries don't have the same religion as here?" This made me laugh for the longest time!!!
Um Please only capture what I said if quoting me as I never said Well, look at it this way... if they were actually intelligent, the Hubble wouldn't have needed to be fixed to begin with... That was another person you cut out of the quote
The only thing I said was I work at Ball Aerospace and fix PC's for Rocket Scientists. Funny many are just like those people above... honestly. And just think these are the ones that just sent up Kepler and fixed Hubble... again
While I will admit their are MANY of the people I support who are damned intelligent, there are many who have ZERO common sense. A great example is this
Why store 120 GB of unreplacable data on your hard drive when there is a server that you can do it on that gets backed up daily, weekly and monthly? Damned idiotic if you ask me, but what do I know, I just have to try and recover their data when their hard drive fails and then get yelled out when it's impossible for me to do. Not to brilliant if you ask me, but hey what do I know, I don't have a collage degree, I just learned everything I know about PC's by doing it and using what was given to me. Then again Intelligence has nothing to do with a piece of paper from some university.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/311w1g0.jpg)
Quote from: LadyElizabeth on July 14, 2009, 03:51:22 PM
OK people, that is just mean. I'm a rocket scientist and I'm no where near stupid!!!! Some smart people don't have common sense, but I know a million rocket scientists and they are some of the smartest people I know!!!!
Difference between book smart and street smart. I was on a virus call on our network at Peterson AFB (the network techs were all extremely busy, so the head of the network asked if I could possibly take care of it... no problem). This major, who was the one that infected his computer with the ILuvU virus (this was a while ago), looked at me point blank and said, "I got this email with an attachment. It said the attachment was quarantined, so I figured it was safe to open."
>.<
"No sir, this virus relies on a Layer 8 vulnerability, and causes a General Fault "Eye-Dee-Ten-Tee" error."
Quote from: Lady de Laney on July 14, 2009, 10:15:02 PM
While I will admit their are MANY of the people I support who are damned intelligent, there are many who have ZERO common sense.
*nodsnods* You got it! I learned a long time ago that some of the smartest people around have absolutely no common sense whatsoever. Makes me wonder how they have managed to survive without it. They've gotta have someone looking out after them, someone who really feels pity that they can be so smart, yet be so dumb at the same time.
I work for Wal-Mart. I have been there for about 15 long years now. I work in the jewelry department. We are right in front of the store. I have about 6 customers a month come up to the counter and look me straight in the face and ask me "Mame where is your jewelry department located in this store?" After I get the shocked look off my face I tell them to look down. Then I get the famous line "if it was a snake it would of bit me now wouldn't it" and in the back of my head I'm wishing one would.
Ok This one I have to share.
My daughter went with some co-workers to a class in basic self-defense for women.
Question: What do you do if a stranger comes to your door unexpectedly dressed like a repairman.
Female #1: Ask him for a phone number so you can call and see if he's legit?
Daughter: Oh yeah. Call his buddy Bob or whoever and find out what a legit guy he is. Hellooooo.
Ever thought of looking up the company and phone number on the internet?
Quote from: DonaCatalina on July 15, 2009, 07:35:06 AM
Ok This one I have to share.
My daughter went with some co-workers to a class in basic self-defense for women.
Question: What do you do if a stranger comes to your door unexpectedly dressed like a repairman.
Female #1: Ask him for a phone number so you can call and see if he's legit?
Daughter: Oh yeah. Call his buddy Bob or whoever and find out what a legit guy he is. Hellooooo.
Ever thought of looking up the company and phone number on the internet?
I was in a similar situation once, and gave the answer, "Think to myself, 'Er, gee, did I call a repairman? NO?!' Then I don't open the door." A girl in the class said "But what if your husband or landlord called the repairman? Then you'll have to wait for another one!"
. . . The teacher of the class had to explain to her that not only is it unlikely that your husband or your landlord would call a repairman without telling you, but that missing a repairman and having to call again or wait for another one isn't really the worst outcome of this situation. *sigh*
Granted, we're both former soldiers and security contractors, but my 5' tall teeny wife (oh, my ribs and kidneys would pay if she ever saw that) answers the door with her sidearm behind it most of the time. Of course, this makes for an interesting shuffle when the Fed Ex guy hands her the clipboard to sign for the package and she has to tuck her XD40 under her left arm to sign it, and the expressions on the delivery guys' faces are priceless.
Speaking of, I remember attending the NRA convention in Houston a few years back representing my firm when I walked into the Springfield booth. A senior sergeant of a major local department that shall remain nameless was looking at the XD9- a semiautomatic pistol with no hammer- and asked if it was single action or double action (http://www.firearmstalk.com/forums/f14/what-single-double-action-1937/#post8206). Now, for a non-gun-person, this wouldn't stand out as a stupid question, but for a veteran law enforcement officer- a sergeant at that- it is a whole different story, especially on a pistol blatantly without a hammer. It frightened me.
Quote from: Breandan on July 16, 2009, 02:35:46 AM
Granted, we're both former soldiers and security contractors, but my 5' tall teeny wife (oh, my ribs and kidneys would pay if she ever saw that) answers the door with her sidearm behind it most of the time. Of course, this makes for an interesting shuffle when the Fed Ex guy hands her the clipboard to sign for the package and she has to tuck her XD40 under her left arm to sign it, and the expressions on the delivery guys' faces are priceless.
Speaking of, I remember attending the NRA convention in Houston a few years back representing my firm when I walked into the Springfield booth. A senior sergeant of a major local department that shall remain nameless was looking at the XD9- a semiautomatic pistol with no hammer- and asked if it was single action or double action (http://www.firearmstalk.com/forums/f14/what-single-double-action-1937/#post8206). Now, for a non-gun-person, this wouldn't stand out as a stupid question, but for a veteran law enforcement officer- a sergeant at that- it is a whole different story, especially on a pistol blatantly without a hammer. It frightened me.
Your wife answers the door like i do. The cable guy asked me if that was a shotgun i was holding... i had to ask him if he'd like a closer look.
I've occasionally answered the door that way too...only I use a sword. :)
Quote from: Elennare on July 16, 2009, 11:22:38 AM
I've occasionally answered the door that way too...only I use a sword. :)
Where do you guys live where you have to answer the door with guns and swords? I could say in Colorado it all depends on what neighborhood and city you live in. And I will say the mojority of places you do not have to answer a door like that even in Denver or Colorado Springs
I used to answer doors with swords, knives, guns or whatever I could get ahold of. But that was when I lived in a bad neighborhood.
Quote from: Lady de Laney on July 16, 2009, 11:26:20 AM
Quote from: Elennare on July 16, 2009, 11:22:38 AM
I've occasionally answered the door that way too...only I use a sword. :)
Where do you guys live where you have to answer the door with guns and swords? I could say in Colorado it all depends on what neighborhood and city you live in. And I will say the mojority of places you do not have to answer a door like that even in Denver or Colorado Springs
It doesn't matter which neighborhood you live in if you are a woman home alone. No disresepect intended to anyone;
but there are very few women who have the hand to hand combat training to fight off someone who forces their way into your home. Even if their original intent was robbery, an unarmed female alone in the house is sometimes to easy of a target to pass up. riminals intent on home invasion usually chooses nice middle class neighborhoods where people tend to be trusting
and may not have alarms. I don't live in a bad neighborhood, but about 6 years ago there was a woman raped and beaten two blocks away. She was home alone and didn't realize that the storm door could be kicked in so easily.
I keep a .357 loaded with .125 jhp for when his excellency is out of town.
I don't even use the same route to get to and from work.
But the best way to be safe is to not answer the door to ANYONE that you're not expecting and always be aware of your surroundings.
Always check your car before you get in. Lock the door of the house even if you're out in the garage.
Never leave the garage door open unless you are in the garage and it is daylight.
-off my soapbox now-
Yup. The easiest way to become a victim is to believe "It could never happen to me".
normally i don't answer the door if i'm not expecting anyone if i am then i'm armed even if they don't know it
With my back so flared up with pain I can't even walk down the stairs sometimes to see who is there. I yell out the upstairs window and tell themm to step back so I can see who they are and what they want. If I don't know them I show them I have a phone and tell them they got until 3 till I hit the call button for the cops.
Quote from: DonaCatalina on July 16, 2009, 02:49:55 PMIt doesn't matter which neighborhood you live in if you are a woman home alone. No disresepect intended to anyone;
but there are very few women who have the hand to hand combat training to fight off someone who forces their way into your home.
Oh, my wife has the training- Aikido and Krav Maga- she's just lazy ;D
(http://i32.tinypic.com/derxxv.jpg)
Quote from: Lady de Laney on July 16, 2009, 11:26:20 AM
Quote from: Elennare on July 16, 2009, 11:22:38 AM
I've occasionally answered the door that way too...only I use a sword. :)
Where do you guys live where you have to answer the door with guns and swords? I could say in Colorado it all depends on what neighborhood and city you live in. And I will say the mojority of places you do not have to answer a door like that even in Denver or Colorado Springs
I may live outside Houston, kinda in the country, but i had some illegal obama supporter try to kick my door in when i wasn't there. Lucky he stopped when he did for there was a 160lbs Great Dane and a 90lbs Rott on the other side. I watched another guy, a door to door "salesman" try to open my neighbor's door and then try the same thing at my house, while his buddy started to push my motorcycle away. I "convinced'' him not too... well, myself and a lock & loaded AK-47. All i could say, as they ran down the driveway, was "Merry Christmas, Mother F#@%ers!"... they found all my Xmas lights the hard way.
I'm former Spec Forces and I've always lived a touch on the paranoid side... i have a Katana next to my bed, a .45 in the nightstand a 12 gauge inside the bedroom door and other "toys" scattered around the house.
Quote from: Fraser of Lovatt on July 17, 2009, 09:15:07 AM
Quote from: Lady de Laney on July 16, 2009, 11:26:20 AM
Quote from: Elennare on July 16, 2009, 11:22:38 AM
I've occasionally answered the door that way too...only I use a sword. :)
Where do you guys live where you have to answer the door with guns and swords? I could say in Colorado it all depends on what neighborhood and city you live in. And I will say the mojority of places you do not have to answer a door like that even in Denver or Colorado Springs
I may live outside Houston, kinda in the country, but i had some illegal obama supporter try to kick my door in when i wasn't there. Lucky he stopped when he did for there was a 160lbs Great Dane and a 90lbs Rott on the other side. I watched another guy, a door to door "salesman" try to open my neighbor's door and then try the same thing at my house, while his buddy started to push my motorcycle away. I "convinced'' him not too... well, myself and a lock & loaded AK-47. All i could say, as they ran down the driveway, was "Merry Christmas, Mother F#@%ers!"... they found all my Xmas lights the hard way.
I'm former Spec Forces and I've always lived a touch on the paranoid side... i have a Katana next to my bed, a .45 in the nightstand a 12 gauge inside the bedroom door and other "toys" scattered around the house.
That..was...AWESOME!! More than once my husband has wished we lived in Texas!
As far as answering the door...I'm lucky that there is a window right next to the front door, so all I have to do is look out to see who's there. If I don't know them, IF I feel like it, I'll crack the window open slightly to see what they want, then if I don't want to bother with them I can just say "go away" and close the window.
I wish things where I live were still the way they were when we were kids. You could leave your house and car unlocked...really..nothing ever happened here in our quiet little rural community. Now that it's not quite so rural anymore, things are completely different. Just a few months ago somebody stole our riding mower out of our backyard late at night, while we were still up. Luckily we got it back, but it's just a sign of the times. There has been a rash of armed home invasions around our county this summer as well. Sigh.... :-\
As far as the idiot sightings are concerned...well the guy that stole our lawn mower quickly discovered there was no key, plus the battery was dead anyway. So, he pushed this heavy mower through thick grass and rough ground, out to the road and pushed it up the road over half a mile, in POURING RAIN no less. A good samaritan saw him and figured he was up to no good and called the police. The state trooper then found him and a girlfriend trying to jump start the mower-"honestly officer, we were just trying to help this person start their mower, but they had to walk back to their house for minute" -( at 10:00 at night in the rain). The officer impounded the mower, which we got back after calling the barracks to report the mower stolen. We had a good chuckle with the arresting officer over it, and we are awaiting to hear about a court date. The officer was quite pleased that we came forward, because they've had many run ins with this guy before, but were never able to nail him with anything big, just petty stuff. This time the theft is a felony, 'cause the value of the mower is $1800. The guy'll still probably get a slap on the wrist, but we still intend to prosecute as far as we can. Give this little 19/20 year old punk a message...I'm just glad in a way that my husband didn't catch him in the act, or HE would be the one on trial for beating the snot out of him, or worse if he'd been able to get to his gun on time.
The very first gift Bacardi ever gave me was a bat.. I lived alone in a not so fabulous neighborhood at the time.. (that gift bought him an "in" with my Dad!)
After he moved in with me in the not so fabulous neighborhood he brought his TX arsenal with him.. Not sure what it all is, but I do know it includes a couple of .45's... They are not loaded (by my request.. I have had a loaded gun pointed at my head by a rotten bastage of a ex boyfriend.. but that's a story for another time) the clip? is right by the gun for quick loading..
Now that we do not live in the not so fabulous neighborhood, but a proper suburban one we still have the guns, the bat is under the bed on my side and he has the giant beast of a flashlight on his side..
Funny enough I didn't even think to grab any of the above just the other night, and I probably should have..
I was sitting on our back patio when I heard the doorbell, I was on the phone with my Mom at the time, so I went into the house to see who it was.. when I came to the door, I left the screen door shut, it was a salesperson from a steak company (I won't say which one).. At first I thought this kid was drunk, because he did a little dance and spun around, asked me if I was Queen of the castle, and was just acting kind of odd.... He kept wanting to shake my hand and would reach up to the screen, I was in no way going to open the door!! (Bacardi was at work and it was close to dark: 8:30 pm or so) I informed him that I was on the phone and pointed to my bluetooth.. he kept his sales pitch going until I had said NO THANK YOU!!! and shut the door and bolted it...
I told Mom I was certainly glad I was on the phone with her.. His behaviour gave me the creeps...
You can't really be safe anywhere.. Even if you have weapons.. They can always be taken from you and used against you...
The only thing we can all do is be smart...
To the original topic.... I work with Lawyers Claims.. The adjusters are all attorneys and brilliant people.. on paper.......... They are possibly some of the dumbest people I have ever come across when it comes to common sense.. and a few of them are technology/computer challenged!!! Drives me up the WALL!!! ::) Really you went to law school but loading paper into a copier is beyond your expertise?!!
it seems the higher up in office hierarchy people become, the more inept at the functions of the office they become!
I get a charge from police reports: ;D
(http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l142/Marianna00/a219_p1.jpg)
(http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l142/Marianna00/a219_p2.jpg)
(http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l142/Marianna00/a219_p3.jpg)
(http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l142/Marianna00/a219_p9.jpg)
Gotta love police reports
SANTA BARBARA, California - A career criminal was sentenced to 25 years to life in prison under California's three-strikes law for stealing $11 worth of wine, lip balm and breath freshener.Superior Court Judge Frank Ochoa called Ronald Herrera, 57, one of the worst criminals to pass through his courtroom, and prosecutor Darryl Perlin said: "He's what the three-strikes law is all about." Herrera's record lists 17 serious felonies, including a 1971 home-invasion robbery and rape of a woman and her 15-year-old daughter, the shooting of a police dispatcher, and six armed robberies in Virginia.He was sentenced Thursday for burglary and petty theft at a supermarket. At trial, his lawyer said Herrera has a brain injury that made him forget to pay for the items.
=================================================================================
I don't remember how I found this site, but it always makes me feel better about my job:
http://notalwaysright.com/
That site is my 4pm go-to. Overheardintheoffice.com is good too ;D
Quote from: Anna Iram on July 17, 2009, 12:44:30 PM
(http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l142/Marianna00/a219_p9.jpg)
hahahaha! Nominee for the ADC Awards much?! XD
Reminds me of the two guys that were lifting air bags out of the cars at the local dealership back home. They had busted into about 50 cars by the time a patrol car showed up... except they hadn't put a single one in their own car, just had them lined up right behind each and every car for easy tagging, and even left a bonus of complete sets of fingerprints on each and every one!
I started making bubble machines back in 1983 to use as wind indicators while flying kites. Since then I have used bubble machines just for fun as well as on the kite field. Over the years I have had quite a few people ask me to turn the bubble machines around because the bubbles were blowing the wrong way! ::)
Ok, ok....I gotta add a few.
As some of you may or may not know, I used to work on an Island with ferry boats shuttling tourists to and from the mainland. Without fail, every stinkin' season, one or all of the below listed questions would get asked:
1. What time does the 7 o'clock (or any o'clock) boat leave?
2. Does the water go all the way around the island?
And to understand the last one, you have to know that The Mackinac Bridge (http://www.mackinacbridge.org/facts--figures-16/) connects the Upper and Lower penninsulas of Michigan and it's a BIG HONKIN' suspension bridge. This little factoid leads us to our last "Commonly Asked Questions of Mackinac Island".
3. What time does that bridge swing over to the island? (and yes, this one got asked at least once a year)
Oh - yes, I hear you on that one. It reminded me of my favorite tourist question of all time. I too lived on a long thin island. There were two roads, one along the sound side and one along the ocean side. A customer sitting at an ocean side table asked where the fishing pier was (visible to him sitting at that table). Thinking he meant how much further up the road, I answered "its about a quarter of a mile, Avalon is the name, and it costs $2". No, he replied, what side of the road?
My second favorite "you live here all year round? What do you do in the winter?" We hibernate... "Wow, really?"
I grew up in Sitka and Juneau, used to get that from the tourists all the time ::)
Quote from: mehan on July 19, 2009, 07:51:57 AM
Oh - yes, I hear you on that one. It reminded me of my favorite tourist question of all time. I too lived on a long thin island. There were two roads, one along the sound side and one along the ocean side. A customer sitting at an ocean side table asked where the fishing pier was (visible to him sitting at that table). Thinking he meant how much further up the road, I answered "its about a quarter of a mile, Avalon is the name, and it costs $2". No, he replied, what side of the road?
My second favorite "you live here all year round? What do you do in the winter?" We hibernate... "Wow, really?"
.
I hear ya! People were always shocked to find out we actually lived up there during the winter. I think most people assume the whole place shuts down and there's just some sort of Jack Torrence-esque caretaker.
Quote from: MaelStrom on July 19, 2009, 02:51:27 PM
Quote from: mehan on July 19, 2009, 07:51:57 AM
Oh - yes, I hear you on that one. It reminded me of my favorite tourist question of all time. I too lived on a long thin island. There were two roads, one along the sound side and one along the ocean side. A customer sitting at an ocean side table asked where the fishing pier was (visible to him sitting at that table). Thinking he meant how much further up the road, I answered "its about a quarter of a mile, Avalon is the name, and it costs $2". No, he replied, what side of the road?
My second favorite "you live here all year round? What do you do in the winter?" We hibernate... "Wow, really?"
.
I hear ya! People were always shocked to find out we actually lived up there during the winter. I think most people assume the whole place shuts down and there's just some sort of Jack Torrence-esque caretaker.
They really wouldn't believe my cousin that moves from Harrison up to Lac La Belle every November and comes back down in April. Even we think she's nuts! ???
The following film has been modified from its original version. It has been formatted to fit this screen
"How do they know how big my TV is??!!"
lady pegos told me about that one, i don't know who said it though.
I spent a few years in Seward, Alaska. The vast majority of our industry was summer time tourism. This town, for those who aren't familiar, is on a bay/fjord, and is a port of call for multiple cruise lines. There are very few places in town where you can not see the bay if your outside. I can remember, on multiple occasions, having someone walk into the store where I worked, look out the front picture windows, overlooking the bay, and say "Wow, it sure is beautiful around here. What's the elevation?" I couldn't resist making comments like " Oh, I don't know.. four?" or "Well, we're probably lower than your room on the ship." And of course, working in a tourist town, in a little shop, we'd get questions like "Do you take American money around here?" (Gee, last I checked, Alaska is a STATE) or "What day does the sun go down?" or, especially being on the souther coast "Do you have many problems with polar bears?". We even had people ask why they didn't see any penguins.
I've heard all of those and more. Funniest one being from an Irish immigrant family and asked by tourists if I'm an Eskimo... oy vey ::)
Quote from: Breandan on July 19, 2009, 09:11:22 PM
I've heard all of those and more. Funniest one being from an Irish immigrant family and asked by tourists if I'm an Eskimo... oy vey ::)
Shoulda had a bottle of Elmer's on hand for those questions... "This is as close to 'igloo' as I get."
Yeah, ok, bad pun, heh
Ired By Shire Attire
Clothing Store | Montreal, Canada
Customer: "Excuse me, can you help me choose which suit I should get?"
Me: "Certainly. This model here was worn by actor Sean Astin."
Customer: "Who is that?"
Me: "He played in The Lord of the Rings. He was one of the hobbits."
Customer: "You sell to hobbits!?"
Me: "Well, he's not re–"
Customer: "You shouldn't sell to hobbits!"
http://notalwaysright.com/
Quote from: MaelStrom on July 18, 2009, 11:48:37 PM
Ok, ok....I gotta add a few.
As some of you may or may not know, I used to work on an Island with ferry boats shuttling tourists to and from the mainland. Without fail, every stinkin' season, one or all of the below listed questions would get asked:
1. What time does the 7 o'clock (or any o'clock) boat leave?
2. Does the water go all the way around the island?
And to understand the last one, you have to know that The Mackinac Bridge (http://www.mackinacbridge.org/facts--figures-16/) connects the Upper and Lower penninsulas of Michigan and it's a BIG HONKIN' suspension bridge. This little factoid leads us to our last "Commonly Asked Questions of Mackinac Island".
3. What time does that bridge swing over to the island? (and yes, this one got asked at least once a year)
I use to live in Cheboygan,MI and I could never get over how fascinated people got when the main street would stop so the bridge could open and let a sailboat go under. Tourist would get out off their cars just to take pictures. Mackinaw city is only 15 miles from where I use to live and I remember as a kid riding my bike from home to there just for fudge. A few times my friends and I would get honked at and people would pull over just to see if our parents knew where we were going or if we were riding for some reason like a bike a thon or something like that. This was back in the mid 80s.
Well I guess the week wouldn't be complete without my own idiot sighting.
Just a little background, I am currently working on designing brand new brochures for our business and of course getting them printed.
That means I have had a parade of printing service salespeople in my office.
Well one lady came in yesterday, she is new to the business.
I went over everything with her, gave her dimensions etc.
The main piece I am interested is a 8 panel (4 on each side- horizontally ) brochure that folds accordion style onto itself, each panel measuring 7"x7".
Today she calls me and asks " I need to get from you the overall length of the accordion brochure so I can get you the quote". A little taken a back I ask, "you mean the one that has 4 panels each 7x7???"
her: "yes that one"
me: " well 7 times 4 is 28 so I would say 28 inches long".
her:"ok perfect thanks"
I am still in shock over it