Pre Canon Opening Weekend

[Jon Hanslow]

/angry. My boss told me today I most likely willl not have either day off. I haven't missed opening weekend in 15 years.....im not happy. I asked for this weekend off in January.

Captain Jon Hanslow, Pirate extraordinaire!

[Ms Trish]

/angry. My boss told me today I most likely willl not have either day off. I haven't missed opening weekend in 15 years.....im not happy. I asked for this weekend off in January.

Captain Jon Hanslow, Pirate extraordinaire!

*cough sneeze hack* Sounds like you're catching a cold!

[auntiegiggles]

Wow, may have to make an opening gate show.  I have never  seen one.

If you make it to a gate show you can help me prep for our gate show at the Fest Pity Party 

[Gauwyn of Bracknell]

/angry. My boss told me today I most likely willl not have either day off. I haven't missed opening weekend in 15 years.....im not happy. I asked for this weekend off in January.

Captain Jon Hanslow, Pirate extraordinaire!

*cough sneeze hack* Sounds like you're catching a cold!

yeah, he didn't look good at Bristol (new definition of 'faire crud')

[Marietta Graziella]

How wonderful that we are renewing our tradition of pre-cannon tailgating! Helping each other finish dressing (notice how I avoided the term "tieing each other up"? ), perhaps a bit of a breakfast nibble (be sure to bring some extra for the parking lot attendants!), hydrating with some last minute beverage (all mugs empty before going through the gate, folks!)... Also, be sure to clean up! No trash left behind or they will put the kabash on our morning gathering faster than you can say "commando!" on a windy day.

For any newcomers to MN, this is the perfect place to put faces with names. It was at an opening day tail gate event almost 10 years ago that I first introduced myself to many of my now very good friends.

As for post cannon 10:00am meet up, we had done the mead booth, then Foaming Stein, then it was Sots. I believe this year our favorite pub folks will be inhabiting Sheriffs (?). It's the quaintly cozy, 2-butt pub nestled between the food booths over by the stocks. Not that our other pub purveyor pals should be ignored! Share the beer love (and your tips)! However, traditionally our morning meet ups have followed the teams of Muffin, Capt Bacardi, Noble Dreg, and Toarmod. 

However you choose to enjoy your day at faire, look for the R/F pins and say hello!

[Gauwyn of Bracknell]

I'll bring mead (although nobody likes it  )

[Kiss-me-Kate]

Wow, may have to make an opening gate show.  I have never  seen one.

If you make it to a gate show you can help me prep for our gate show at the Fest Pity Party 

Shoul I be afraid? 

[Ms Trish]

Wow, may have to make an opening gate show.  I have never  seen one.

If you make it to a gate show you can help me prep for our gate show at the Fest Pity Party 

Shoul I be afraid? 

Just make sure to have proper attire for the Pity Party and all will be fine!

[auntiegiggles]

Wow, may have to make an opening gate show.  I have never  seen one.

If you make it to a gate show you can help me prep for our gate show at the Fest Pity Party 

Shoul I be afraid? 

Maybe.....*evil giggles*

[auntiegiggles]

SO excited to meet up with everyone before opening cannon! As MG stated, lets be courteous and clean up after ourselves   

[Random Girl]

Ok kids my Safety Services hat is going on.

HI! I'm Nessa! You're friendly mohawk'd security girl with a few announcements (I am still operating pre-orientation so I likely will not have all your answers handy for another week or so)

Item the first! I am working swing shift this year which is a little bit of both night shift and day shift. (noon to midnight or one...sometimes two)

Item the second! The gates open at 9AM!

Item the third! As in many other years I give you all the following reminder. THERE IS NO DRINKING IN THE PARKING LOT! Yes, we do check fairly regularly ESPECIALLY during your happy pre-cannon tailgate breakfast.  We don't mind the food so long as you pick up after yourselves.  If you are seen drinking you will be asked to pour out your tasty beverage.  If you do not comply we have the right to refuse you entrance.  Are we a buzz-kill? Yep!

What's our motto again friends?  That's right! WE HATE FUN (or alternatively "Odissimur Iocos") See my tattoo for more details.

Item the fourth! If you bring a flask/your own beverage/multiple litres of shiny vodka onto the site and we catch you with it you will be asked to pour it out. If we catch you with it again we may eject you. Both of these are more likely if you are being a drunk obnoxious a-hole.  When in doubt, remember the motto.  *see above*

Item the fifth!  If you are bringing youngin's please take a sharpie marker to their arm and WRITE YOUR NAME AND TELEPHONE NUMBER ON IT. (the cell phone...we know you aren't home, or at least you better not be) Lost children are a HUGE BIG F-ING DEAL.  If you've misplaced your kid, either hail a person wearing RED AND YELLOW with a big old flag on a staff that may be in your general area. If one is not immediately present HEAD DIRECTLY TO THE INFORMATION BOOTH (located in front of Bad Manor)  After coming in the gate point this location out to your children as well as the lovely and fine people in the smashing Ketchup and Mustard.

Item the sixth! The parking lot to the best of my knowledge is a mess.  I know (at this time) NOTHING regarding parking, the state of the lot, or care how butthurt everyone is about it.

Item the seventh!  If you get drunk and drive home and I find out about it, I will personally hunt you down, steal your keys, and toss them down the nearest privy. (That is my own policy and does not reflect that of Safety Services or Mid America Festivals....though it should be)

Item the eighth! I love you all, but if you go out and do something stupid you are ON YOUR OWN.  I will not help you and I will not save you from certain fate. This also means that if I catch you doing something inherently stupid I WILL treat you as I would any other patron.  Furthermore if I'm working (which is 99% of the time unless explicitly stated otherwise) do not offer me alcohol, begin a lengthy conversation and get huffy when I have to run away (which may or may not be your fault based on the conversation).  Do not approach/touch me from behind (I'm not being kinky here, I mean it). That's a good way to get elbowed in the gut or kicked in the nards.

Item the ninth!  I love hugs. I really really do.  Please do light hugs from MY left side. No bear hugs.  It clicks on my mic and is detrimental to anyone trying to actually report something at that time. My mic will typically be worn on the right hand side.

Finally item the tenth!  If you are an employee you had better have your pass on you at all times.  If you do not have your pass, lose it or were not given it yet (in the case of early weekends) you'd better get a paper pass.  I have no sympathy and when pass time comes around you are a nobody to me.  I've sent the woman who helped me deliver my kid back to get her pass...don't think I won't do it to you.

That's all I have for now.  I will report back after orientation with any relevant information I am able to share.

Live long and prosper, stay black kill whitey, may the force be with you, multipass, don't taze me bro!

-Nessa
Random Girl in the backyard
Mohawk'd chick with many tattoos
Ketchup and Mustard
Swing Shift Safety Services Sitewalker.

[DeadBishop]

The 'hawked one has spoken! 

I should be able to make it for the traditional pre-cannon gathering.  My duties are a bit more lax this year, I'll be swinging hammers and slinging steel with the motley crew at Arms and Armor.  Which means I don't have to hide in a booth all day.

[Gauwyn of Bracknell]

OK, now I am a bit confused. In the past yhe parking gate opened at 8, since the Faire opens at 9. According to RG, the parking gate opens at 9??

(BTW, my comment about the mead was an inside joke)

[Capt. Bacardi]

Parking gate opens at 8, the fest gate opens at 9.

[Marietta Graziella]

I so love Nessa's annual SS briefing!

She's not kidding, folks, so let us not do something that would force her to enforce the rules on us. She is at fest to do a job not babysit people being stupid.

*so excited!!*