I admit it... I'm scared

[Lady Amy of York]

Rani,
  What you said  in your last post was  just beautiful  !
  You are a strong, and  beautiful person, not just on the outside, but inside  too  !     Hang in there girlfriend.  I know  you area fighter and  a strong  spirit and  you will make  it  thru  all of  this.    Love you.  Hugs !

[Peddlin]

You are very welcome, Rani, but I didn't say anything that is not true. You are an inspiration, and we are all very fortunate to be in each other's lives.

Lairde Guard'n and I spent the last week taking my 89 year old father out to party, which is always an experience. He had a wonderful time with his children and grandchildren, and even though he will be paying for it for the next couple of weeks, it was worth every minute. I have discovered that it is the memories that we make that are important.

Bless us every one!

[lordwriothsley]

That was very nicely said Peddlin.You are right,memories are what make things even more sweeter and they also live on forever which to me is a very good feeling right there in itself.

[Rani Zemirah]

Each of us gives of themselves in the ways that resonate within us.

Lady Amy, if I am strong it's because you make me so! I see your own struggle, and understand that what you have gone through, and are going through still, must be so much more frightening than my own trials, and I see you stand up and face it with courage every day, even when courage seems impossible, while still loving and supporting all of us here, so how can I possibly do less when you inspire me so???

Peddlin, your father is lucky to have a daughter who loves him enough to spend time with him, and make sure he is surrounded by loved ones, and you are lucky to still have him to party with!!! My grandfather is 95, and my grandmother is 89, and they both had to miss Thanksgiving dinner because my GM was ill, and my GF wouldn't leave her. So, everyone stopped by afterward in ones and twos to visit, and so it didn't become the first Thanksgiving without them... Memories are indeed important, as are our loved ones!

Lord W, that is exactly right, our memories are what we pass on when we share them with the ones we love, and that is it's own kind of immortality...

We all shine, and that is the light of the Universe...

[maelstrom0370]

I'd like to officially re-present myself, my Queen.
Apologoies for my over long absence.

[Rani Zemirah]

I am so glad to see you, Commander! How are the raver raids in the northern reaches going??? I know it's difficult with all the snow and such you've had up there, but please try not to stay away so long again! We've been having quite the circle while you've been gone, however... I think it might be time for that dance you promised me, Sir!!! The ladies have been waiting patiently...

LOL

[maelstrom0370]

Oh ummm...THAT dance!!??
Would you settle for a kilted can-can?

[Rani Zemirah]

Not on your life!!! Perhaps I can arrange to have the circle cleared, however, since the dance was originally offered as tribute to me, and not as entertainment in general. And as my Commander of the Sacrifice I can grant a favor if I am so inclined. You may dance for me without other eyes (or cameras named Haggis) pointed at you, Sir. Allow me to have the fire stoked, and I'm sure the "entertainment" could use a break! Have a tankard of your beverage of choice, Commander, while I make arrangements.. 

(this should prove interesting... ) 

ROFL

[Rani Zemirah]

I have the most incredibly amazing news... EVAR!!!!!!!

IT'S GONE!!!!!!! Undetectable levels in the blood, that's what the labs I took last week said!!!!!!! The virus is gone, and my chemo will only have to last the original 24 weeks, instead of the 72 they recently said it might have to last if I couldn't clear it right away! I still have to take the maintenance doses for another 16 weeks... but I no longer have the killer in my body!!!!!!!

Sorry, reaction is finally setting in, and I'm starting to cry!!!

I am so thankful to each of you who have been here for me, and who I'm sure will continue to be here through the rest of my treatments, and I just want you all to know how much you all mean to me, and how much every word you have all written here has lifted me out of myself and helped to make me whole again!!! Thanks to you all I have laughed until I cried many times, I have cried and you have comforted me, I have found my way out of the wilderness and to the flame of lasting friendship and I have had more fun than someone so ill should ever have expected to have!!!

We're not done yet... but when the chemo is over for good and I am healthy again, I have promised myself to ask admin if we can move this thread to John's Inn and rename it something that has absolutely nothing to do with fear!!! Will any of you make the trip with me???

[Lady_Glorianna]

Many congratulations on your news

[Rani Zemirah]

Thank you so much, Lady Glorianna! I hope things will begin to turn around for you soon! I still am sending you loving comfort for your loss, and healing energy to help lessen your pain. I hope it can help even a tiny bit!

[Fairyfly]

Very good news to hear hun! *HUGS* I'll save the hugtackles for when you're all better and up to getting them. Lol
Of course I'll follow you to John's Inn. Wouldn't be the first time I've visited there. Tee hee 

[lordwriothsley]

Rani sweetheart this is such wonderful news.I'm so glad that the killer is gone,see what the power of prayer can do.Just like FairyFly said I will of course make the trip to Johns Inn with you as it won't be the first that I to have visited there either.HUGS to you sweetie.

[Rani Zemirah]

Oh I'm so glad you both want to continue this adventure!!! It's become something so different than it started out as, and we've begun having so much fun with this whole fire/drum/dance circle that I think it might need a new permanent home in John's Inn... and that way we can get as wild as... well, as we can all deal with!!!  LOL

Oh, Lord Flame, will you see that the fire is built up double this time, and Lady Whip... will you see that the dancers are taken for refreshment and allowed to rest a bit, then you may entertain yourself how you like with them until I recall them to the Fire. I have a command performance to attend, and I am guessing I will never get to see it if there are others present... LOL  Now where is the Mistress of the Revels??? I believe I'll need to lay in a stock of Loki for this performance... (hmmmm... wonders if she could procure some of this Hot Dam^ I've been hearing about...?)


I'm actually glad it's Friday, for the first time in many weeks, because now that I know this chemo will end sooner rather than later, I'm anxious to be done with it, and it doesn't scare me anymore! It's not fun, of course, but neither is it stronger than I am, particularly with you all by my side!!! Thank you all, again and again...

[Zaubon]

... (hmmmm... wonders if she could procure some of this Hot Dam^ I've been hearing about...?)
...

Let's see, I believe the McLotofus faire van still has a half bottle of Hot Damn! 100, along with some Goldwasser and probably some Goldschlager.