My daughter (19) has been really serious about a young man (21), more so than just the standard high school thing. Since his parents moved back to Texas he has been different, he was fighting with his mother all the time and drinking more. They had gotten into a fight Wednesday night. He commit suicide on Thursday morning. She is devastated, I'm doing all I can, but we all have to deal with death and things like this in our own way. She also lost her grandmother in February of this year.
I'm so sorry, Yrose. I understand what she is going through to some degree.
I had an ex-boyfriend kill himself a few months after we stopped seeing each other. I also was 19.
Just be there for her and it's important she not blame herself or play the 'what if' game.
She will work through this.
I'm sorry to hear this.
Sending healing thoughts and prayers your way, for her!
Keeping your daughter and you in my prayers. It always hurts us when we can not do anything to help ease the hurt that pains our loved ones. Just love her.
I'm so sorry for both of you!
I can't imagine how devasted she is.
I will certainly pray for your daughter and yourself as well. I had to deal with the death of several individuals close to me when I was young as well. It is difficult, but with time and love, the hurt lessens and the healing begins.
The memorial is this evening. I'm praying we make it through uneventful. I have this vision of his mother verbally attacking my daughter. After the memorial we are going to the pond he was found in and casting flowers in our own goodbye I'm doing all I can for her to find closer and move on.
I just prayed that things will go smoothly for both of you - and for his parents as well. It is so easy to be angry when dealing with loss, and I pray that if his parents/family are going though that stage, that they will take pause if they feel the need to strike out, remember your daughter's loss, and embrace her with love. May God bless and comfort you all.
Yrose I just found this thread and I must say that I am in a state of shock right now.That is such devastating news.I am so sorry for you and your daughter and I will absolutely keep you both in my prayers.I also hope that the memorial went well for the both of you without any setbacks.
Kim, still have you and your daughter and his family in my prayers.
Please watch over her and reminder her that this was something beyond them breaking up that he was battling a deamon that got the better of him and she had no control over his actions. The shoulda, coulda, woulda's can not change what happened. Time is the healer. Love and suport from family helps too. I do speak from experience.
I am still thinking about both of you. Wounds like this are slow to heal and I know it will be rough on you and your daughter. I hope it helps her to know others care.
If that is what he really wanted, there is nothing she or anyone else could have done to stop him. It is tragically sad, but there are some who just cannot deal with what life dishes out, and she must realize that his brain and his heart do not suffer, anymore. She has no responsibility for this, and if his parents try to make her feel differently, that is only out of their own pain and guilt. He made his own choices, and it was obviously what he wanted.
Yrose, my thoughts and prayers are with you.
Suicide of someone so young is inded devestating. I have experienced two members of my immediate family who died at their own hands via overdoses , my Aunt in 1981 from alcohol and Valium and my sister on morphine just two years ago.
Both were severely overweight, depressed, and living with severe pain. There were many issues going on in their lives. On the outside, they seemed cheerful and confident. On the inside, they were crying, thinking themsmelves unlovable. I miss them both dearly.
The best you can do is help your daughter understand and appreciate life. Remember the good times and grow.
May comfort and strength be with you.
Yrose, my thoughts are with your Daughter. I went through something a bit similar around the same age as her. I've never forgotten the guy and part of me still loves him to this day. Time will help lessen the pain, but she'll never forget him. Moving on is a good thing, but it takes time and a lot of crying. The coulda, woulda, shoulda's will happen, it's just the way of us humans. Just try to help her not to dwell on them too much. Hug her as much as she'll let you. Remember it's the little things that'll get her through.
*HUGS* to you as well for caring for her as much as you do!
What an awful thing to go through! My thoughts are with your family.