FOKTOP News

[FaeGuardian]

A frightening April Fool's joke, regarding the creation of monstrous, mutant, peeps.
http://planetsave.com/blog/2009/04/01/whale-sized-marshmallows-deployed-to-thwart-japanese-whalers/

Such things should not be joked about lest the evil peep scientists get ideas.

[Queen Bonnie]

 Whale sized Peeps! Now I will have nightmares!
What a horrible prank!Now I will really have to get busy and recruit lots more members for FOKTOP! BIG ones! Hoping it is giants day at Scarby!LOL!

[Ambios]

You'll be needin' to hire harpooners into your corps of agents!

[Count Adolfo]

I am not entirely sure this is a hoax, Majesty...
for some time, FOKTOP Intelligence has been providing my Ministry with Intel on the Peeps... to aid in the propagation of propaganda
Wow... that's a Peep'n mouthful
Anyway, there were rumours of genetic engineering being done by certain Peep Factions to create Uber Peeps
These Uber Peeps would be made with the specific mission of annihilating FOKTOP.

Some of our Intel suggests that Daryl Hannah, herself, is a Peep.
Think about it, she pretty much never goes away...
much like a Peep...
she has yellow hair...

Perhaps Daryl Hannah is, in fact, the Peep Queen?

[Queen Bonnie]

 HMMMM? You bring up some interesting points Count Adolfo! We shall mull them over!
We are now thinking FOKTOP harpooners might be a good idea!  I shall call out the Royal Navy and enlist the help of our Privateers too!
Hold down the castle until I return from Scarborough faire!
HUZZAH FOKTOP! Kill the PEEPS!

[Count Adolfo]

I shall be off to Fiddleworth this weekend...
who can hold down the Castle?

[Queen Bonnie]

 I am back! No Peeps at Scarby and we have many new Foktop members!
Kill the Peeps!

[Count Adolfo]

Oh Majesty, Majesty!!!
There were HUNDREDS of Peeps at the Queen's final tea at BARF!

I shall have some good news to report, shortly, though...

[Queen Bonnie]

 I am not having a good day. I could use good news Count Adolfo!
Hundreds of Peeps! Horrible!

[Count Adolfo]

I am not having a good day. I could use good news Count Adolfo!
Hundreds of Peeps! Horrible!

This is troubling indeed, Majesty, to ALL of us loyal to you and your benevolent rule...
I shall endeavour to hurry along the good news...

[Hector]

Good Count and your Majesty, please allow a non-Foktop herald to share the good news of a glorious execution of the rare but devious King of the Chocolate Clan of Peeps.  Performed by no one less than Queen Catherine Parr herself!  Please notice how she inflicts great pain upon the beast in her noble three step execution.

The first blow was a swift one ending in decapitation!


The second caused him to melt in his inability to serve any good moral purpose and thus returned the Everglades to their natural state.


And the third step set in motion his demise and subsequent execution of all the rest of the clan.


Huzzah!

[Count Adolfo]

Hector, a man such as yourself, whose moral fortitude and upstanding character I, personally, can vouch for, should be a FOKTOP Knight!

Remember the famous quote:
"All that is required for Peeps to triumph is for good folks to do nothing."

You shouldst consider joining our cause.  We have the distinction, in our shire, of having Lord General Jarhead himself commanding the FOKTOP ranks.  He has been granted two stars upon his insignia by Her Majesty herself.
With his leadership, we WILL triumph against the heinous Peep insurgency.
That being said, we could certainly use your help in doing so!

[Queen Bonnie]

 We would be most pleased and happy to include Hector in FOKTOP! Do join us Hector?
We are so very happy to see that your good and beauteous Queen Catherine Parr is helping the cause! Huzzah!VERY Well done! Do give her my best regards! This is happy news indeed!  Grammercy Count Adolfo!

[Anna Iram]

You Majesty! The PEEPS have infiltrated Easter Island! Is nothing sacred to these foul confections? Are we soon to see PEEPs taking the place of other great monuments on our own lands such as The Lincoln Memorial...*shudder*.

[Hector]

Thank you for your invitation your Majesty.  All peeps must die and clearly the support of such noble persons as yourself, Queen Catherine Parr, Count Adolfo, Lord Jarhead and so many others signals that complete victory will one day be achieved.   I do accept, shall convey your regards, and look forward to meeting you in person at TRF if not sooner.

Kill the peeps!