I need a friend or I fear for my future.

[Keno]

I really don't know where else to put it.. For the past.. Well ever since I came back from the Des Moines faire last September I been feeling like a prisoner in my home and cause of it I seem to forgoten how to craft or to fight..  As I try to bite down on my pride I have to say its caused by one man.. My mate.  I don't know if its different paths in life or what but it seems he has pushed the faire joys and comforts out of this home and will crush any attempts of bring it back.  I found out today he was hoping I was going to hate being at the faire and grew quiet when he found I loved it.  In truth I wish I can ask him to leave but with money being tight I dare not to talk about it just to keep a roof over my babies heads.  I can't leave cause I have nowhere to go and I will not have my little ones on the streets..  I wish to start crafting again but with being depressed alot I have no more ideas or dreams.  I need conforts of a friend, someone to talk to and maybe relearn to craft and fight again.  I fear this might be my last attempted of staying sane.  I'm in the Ames area of Iowa. 

Thank you for reading all of you.

Keno

[Betty Munro]

OMG, honey you are in such a tough spot!  Lots of love and postive energy coming your way.
I wish I was geographically closer to provide some physical support.  Hang in there!

[Trillium]

Sending you lots of hugs and positive energy, darlin! 

Perhaps you can seek out a crafting group in your area to give you a break and some inspiration?  Check with your local fabric stores, they may be able to point you in the right direction.

I would also suggest a heart to heart with your mate.  Sounds like you both need to discuss some issues and try to find a way to resolve them.  I know its not easy, especially with little ones to consider.  But if you don't let it be known what the problems are, they can't be fixed.  Men can be pretty oblivious at times...  If worse comes to worse, start putting a little money away, one bit at a time so you have something to fall back on.  I know, easier said than done, but it may be what saves you if you decide to leave.

Good luck to you and keep your chin up!

[lordwriothsley]

Just a quick question Keno.......Do you have any family in the area or close by cause if you do then my suggestion would be to see if they would take you and your little ones in for awhile until you can find a place of your own.

You and your little ones are in my thoughts and prayers at this time.

Hugs and love to you m'lady and may God Bless you as well.

[wyckdblyss]

Sweetheart, I am so sorry to hear about your situation...wish I was closer. I completely understand what you are going through though. Lots of love, hugs and positive energy being sent your way...keep your chin up Honey...it will get better.

[Keno]

I do not have any family in the area, if they were I don't think I would go to them..  That is like trading the gun for a unstable bomb.  I'm doing abit better, it took a fight but hopefuly something works out. 

[Tammy]

I am unfortunately too far away to be of much help...but, if you'd like PM me, and I'll give my cell number. I'm available to chat with most hours of the day and night. I love to craft, sew, make jewelry...and I know what it's like to live with someone that cares nothing for your happiness.

Hugs!

[Luciana]

I am more far away than most, but I understand what are you going through. I send you my prayers and I hope the situation will get better. If you need somebody to talk to just let me know.

[Keno]

Thank you all.  My newest update is hes moving out in Aug 2010.  I dont know If I will be able to stay here, so I have no idea what my future is.. 

[LadyElizabeth]

Keno, I'm so sorry to hear that you are feeling so squashed in your crafting aspirations and in life in general it seems.  I know for me, making beautiful things always makes me feel good, makes me feel like I'm doing something useful.  I double the whole fabric store idea.  Most of them have groups like that to hang with.  In my area, there's also an SCA group of women mostly that meet weekly to do crafts of all sorts.  You should google SCA and then email the group leaders in your area.  SCA folks could also be a great comfort I'd think, though who knows about your specific area. 

I will be praying for you.  I don't know if your a religious person, but personally I am and I believe in prayer.  I would suggest a church as well if you also a religious person.  THey often times have kid groups and get togethers, like play groups and such. 

I truly hope you find something in your life to give you hope again.  And someway to support you and your kids starting in August!

[Merlin]

Lady Elizabeth gives some very good advise there.
I have no idea what your religious beliefs are and I'm certainly not trying to convert you but seeking out some sort of faith will definitely help you.

It also sounds like you have quite a bit of time to decide your path... find out what you want and where you want to be...the path will become obvious when you do that.


Prayers are with you.