Can I Rant for a Moment?

[Lady L]

I have had similar experiences when shopping for a house, a car, other items. R is not the one that makes those decisions, I am. They direct their comments/spiel to him and ignore me. Those are the people that do NOT get the sale.

[Rapier Half-Wit]

So, my husband and I, and several of our friends all play a tabletop wargame.  One of our friends found a new one that he's trying to get us into.  It looked interesting, so last night my husband and I went to the game store to learn how it works.

This is the second time we've been in this particular store.  The first time was not on a gaming night, so there wasn't much going on and no one to show us how the game worked.  So, we go in, and people seem nice enough.  They told us that the guy who's job it is to teach new people the game stepped out and would be back in a little bit.  So, we wait for him to get back, and when he does the guy we had been talking to calls him over and says we should introduce ourselves.

Guy introduces himself to my husband, let's my husband introduce himself, and then launches into his spiel without even looking at me.  No chance for me to introduce myself or explain that I am also interested in learning how this game works.  He introduces my husband to the other guy he was teaching the game to, and proceeds to explain to the two of them how it works, and starts a demo game between them.

Whole time, I'm standing there, looking at the cards used to play, listening to how it works, dude acts like I'm invisible.  This dispite my husband interjecting several times about how I play games and am also a nerd.  It was like he didn't connect that I was the "wife" mentioned, despite my husband making it very obvious that I was who he was talking about.  I asked 2 questions during the demo game.  Dude answered, with a supprised look on his face, and then went back to pretending I was invisible.

The game looks like it will be fun, and I bought an army book for it, but I'm still not convinced that I will like going to that shop to play.  I think the way the dude acted actually made me more upset than when I was refered to as my husband's "secretary" while I was writing up MY army list before a game with him.  That time at least the guys corrected his behavior when he was told that no, I played as well.

This dude, he took the stupid stereotype that women are NEVER interested in actually playing these sorts of games to a whole new level.  I don't think I've ever had someone so completely refuse to acknowledge my existance before.  Why are people so stupid?!?  

I don't understand why any man would act that way towards a woman. But, there's always the possibility that he was jealous of your shoes and found your husband much more **FABULOUS**, if you catch my politically incorrect drift. He's standing in a room full of men and he treats the only lady in sight as if she doesn't exist? Yeah, I'm betting.....

[Lady Christina de Pond]

i've ran into it before gaming when i played xbox live i had guys who had to have me in there team because i was female i've had guys who were just thrilled to hear a girl play and i've had a few who didn't want to play with me because i was a woman
i think some guys do have an issue with us gamer girls but some guys are cool with us maybe rapier is onto something
or he's just a jerk and is afraid he will loose to a woman

[serenamoonsilver]

I think every woman gamer has run into this sort of behavior at least once.  I was once rejected from a World of Warcraft guild because I was a woman and "women cause to much drama".

That said though, I've met some guys who are standoffish at first because they simple haven't had a lot of interaction with the opposite sex and as one of my guy friends put it, "I was scared ****less that I was going to say soemthing stupid and offend you."

[ladylissame]

I still remember one time when I went out to laser tag with my then-fiance-now-husband and a group of his friend.
I was talking with our friend Pastry and his friend John was there. Pastry and I were discussing warlocks in World of Warcraft. His friend John was practically drooling when he asked "You play WoW???" "Yea, I have an 80 mage." Pastry looked at him and said "Don't get your hopes up. She's engaged to him (pointing to my husband)" He looked like a kicked puppy.
A lot of gamer guys don't seem to know how to deal with females.

[Zardoz]

Consider where you were! You spooked a guy that might not have talked to a woman for weeks!     My wife gets it all the time, just like the episode of The Big Bang Theory where Penny goes in the comics store...

[Rapier Half-Wit]

I live love that show.... 

[Sir Ironhead]

Mongoose Publishing put out a series of books for 3rd Ed D&D called "The Slayer's Guide".  There was one for female gamers.

One of the comments from the back cover:
"You cannot truly understand the alien motivations and desires of the Female Gamer, your mind is just not mapped out in the same way but this book may contain a few warnings and signs to look out for so you can avoid the dangers."

Some of the subjects covered are:
The historical role of the female gamer, the physiology of female gamers, feminine magic and prestige classes.

[Butch]

I was thinking along the lines of Serena, LadyLissame, and Zardoz:  these guys probably have no social skills with the opposite sex.  So, they presume women have no interest in them, and women are so far above them, that they don't even feel worthy to talk to you (women).

Not all of these gamers, but obviously, the gentleman with whom you were dealing.

Too bad for him; now kick his behind at his own game!

[DeadBishop]

You need to come up to MN in Feb.  We have a game con "Con of the North", and I'd say that at least 1/3 of the gamers are female.  Believe me, if any customer/gamer were to get ignored, that booth/table would be losing a lot of business, so everyone gets catered to equally.