If aliens actually contact Earth, who speaks for humanity?

[Valiss]

Let's say the Aliens come to Earth and uses our TV system to broadcast a message that they would like to initiate contact with humans and would like to speak to Earth's representative. Well this aint Star Trek and we dont have a single government for Earth yet, so who should do it? Some president? Religious leader? A famous atronomer? Maybe some scientist NASA?

Now I know who should do it and who will actually do it are probably different answers, so give us both if you want.

[Just Randall]

Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, Kenny McCormick and Eric Cartman.

[LadyElizabeth]

Well I think it should be delegation of folks.  Some scientists who would know the in depth questions about where they come from and such.  And then a few people from the UN.  And then some really famous world news anchors who are really good at asking hard hitting questions and getting to the heart of things... 

Who's actually do it?  who knows... I guess it depends on where their ships were, it's probably some kind of group UN decision either way though, a few presidents of the leadings nations probably.

[KeeperoftheBar]

It should be someone with age, experience, common sense and no axe to grind.  Since Walter Cronkite passed away, I would suggest Andy Rooney.  But please, whoever it is, don't let it be a politician, else we might all end up being slaves working in an alien mine somewhere.

[Captain Jack Wolfe]

No one in any position of power, authority, or celebrity whatsoever.  They've gotten us into enough trouble as it stands.

It should be ordinary people.  Plain, simple, wonderfully ordinary people.

[Ferret]

Jeff Foxworthy. Since the aliens are always abducting the dumbest redneck they can find, Jeff might speak their language.
Ferret

[Demetrius]

William Shatner.

[Noble Dreg]

It should be someone with age, experience, common sense and no axe to grind.  Since Walter Cronkite passed away, I would suggest Andy Rooney.  But please, whoever it is, don't let it be a politician, else we might all end up being slaves working in an alien mine somewhere.

Not Andy Rooney!  His eye-brows alone would scare the bajeezus out of the Vogons!  Then he'd open his mouth..."Ever wonder why it's so hard to open a bottle of Aspirin?  They got this little seal with a cotton ball under it..."  E.T. would pack up in a hurry to get away from the sheer boredom!

[Lady Christina de Pond]

send my neighbor dude was supersmart(he just has no common sense) but send someone else with him that has street smarts that way if they eat one they won't

[Morgan Dreadlocke]

Aliens would get much more consistant, truthful, answers interviewing the Magic 8 Ball. (or meybe Ded Bob )

[BubbleWright]

I think a delegation of 4 to 5 year old children would do the job... they are still open to wonderment.

[Barret]

Well they should talk to me of course!

I feel like they would meet with someone from the UN in all reality, probably an elected delegation. But then again, maybe they already meet with humans and just do it on their own terms, and like some one pointed out, they seem to have taken a liking to the more backwards types.

[Ian Maxwell]

I would say, Dennis Prager, If you don't know who he is, go listen to a show or two. Very intelligent man.

Ian

[Lord Clisto of York]

I believe the perfect person would have to be in all seriousness - Stephen Hawking. It's in some way part of his lifes work before he dies knowing the meaning of everything.

[BryanPopp]

Whom ever is going to disect them for the government.